Food tester feline and television cat.

Life is back to its regular schedule now. Except we had snow! Great flakes blowing about, and clinging to everything, little birdies sitting in the trees looking very unimpressed and waiting for me to refill the feeders, schools closed, buses running slowly! Armageddon! Snowpocalypse!

Went to sleep in Wales, woke up in Skyrim.

I plowed through it on my way to work, striding against the wind as the mighty snow reached over the soles of my boots. Yup, you guessed it, Britain was bought to its knees by about an inch of the white menace. It wasn't even there by home time, having melted as people looked at it. Those of you who are reading this in the USA, and Russian Federation - or pretty much anywhere that has ever had snow - please feel free to mock us on the total panic that ensues every winter. Its bloody silly, so it is.

All this cold has meant that the cats have mostly been staying in. Cats all staying in one place leads to trouble. Winter is pretty good with his hoomins, but he is, to be blunt, an absolute douchebag to other cats, with the exception of splatto. It's not that he is nasty, he just wants to play. he does seem to forget that the others are delicate small girl cats, and don't want to have the cat equivalent of playing under 21's rugby with him. He's small, but very muscular. Dense you might say. So he's been hurtling about, in between melting into a semi solid on top of the radiator, impressing them with his acrobatics, and his ability to knock them over.

Winter "Playyyyyyyy with meeeeee!" (complete with doppler effect, as he is moving at nigh light speed)

Splatto " HAHA! OK! Wait......OOOOF!" (as The douche cannons into her sending them both flopping all over the place)

Shoe and PC wait on lofty perches, gently doing stretches and waiting to paff his lordship in the face if he tries anything.

Why they no play? Fine, I shall sit upon this bag of rubbish!

Meanwhile Shoe has been perfecting her thieving skills. She has a twirly villainous moustache, so it is fitting for her to be a master moocher. Now she needs a lacy eyemask like a lady highwaycat. Her main target is teabags. Yes. Teabags. Ruth reported this shennanigan a couple of weeks ago, and I thought it was a one off, a bit like when PC dragged half a loaf of bread into the living room to indicate she was hungry, but no! Shoe is a pathological thief of tea, (a proper tea leaf, as they would say in London). She is brazen, and doesn't even have the good grace to give us the thin eye, or look guilty. I have video evidence, captured at great peril.

Evidence of larceny

The little sod has been trying it with other things too. She nabbed a slice of cheese (win), has attempted to steal some ginger bread (fail), baked beans (soggy footed fail), and stuck her paw in Ruth's ready brek porridge. That left her looking freaked out at why the hoomin was eating dust.

PC has decided she is a window, or something. She's taken to sitting on the sound bar, and leaning against the tv because it is warm. This has made subtitles difficult to read, and a lot of the orphan black and  vikings characters have been replaced with her fuzzy owly face.

I am a viking.

I am a viking


stay warm and safe folks!