tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-53290610312701577362024-02-02T06:24:13.924+00:00Wet BristlesCats and their nefarious plans, rambling on about things that make sense to me, like Voles with monocles. Occasionally even some art stuff and photography.creadurhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13296763039067248323noreply@blogger.comBlogger47125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5329061031270157736.post-1683604754927573212018-03-22T17:28:00.000+00:002018-03-22T17:28:00.042+00:00Metal, hearts, and freezing parts.HI honey, I'm home!<br />
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Its been a busy couple of weeks! I've had to cover some shifts at work so time has been limited for posting, for that I apologise. Also my beloved laptop is finally dying, which complicates matters, because the blogger mobile interface is teeny tiny for someone with poor vision. A new laptop is winging its way to me, so all shall be well by next weekend.<br />
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As you may or may not know, I LARP (live role play). For those of you not in the know, imagine lord of the rings crossed with a sort of free form cross country pantomime, and minor alcoholism, and you have the right idea, sort of. Anyway, I also build props as well as wandering about with a rubber spear. cue one of my favourite builds thus far. A human heart!<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgh1QFDu4a55XvUTdbDhJC-tFiYDw9cxe2u917r_1pf1fYj08UoBqo0WSemYrTKLEHyDD4-PFjNwDVWEVbsJaWXAq8cHPUsjqgt81ggiFLng2joLfyM96n7GsGzM3QqHBuvLXYQ6Rinyfk/s1600/heart.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="903" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgh1QFDu4a55XvUTdbDhJC-tFiYDw9cxe2u917r_1pf1fYj08UoBqo0WSemYrTKLEHyDD4-PFjNwDVWEVbsJaWXAq8cHPUsjqgt81ggiFLng2joLfyM96n7GsGzM3QqHBuvLXYQ6Rinyfk/s320/heart.JPG" width="180" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">kali maaaaaaa, KALI MAAAAAA</td></tr>
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Amazing what you can do with some pictures from google, a car sponge, some latex, and a lot of swearing. Sometimes I think I should have gone for film FX as a career. I hope my friends were grossed out. It was squishy.<div>
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The other recent highlight was HAMMERFEST. Our very good friend Mel won a bunch of tickets, including accommodation, and invited us along. Aaaaaaaaw yeah! We got to Pwllheli friday evening to be met with a whole bunch of diverse and (to the outside world) scary looking people, whilst booze flowed and thumping roaring heavy metal filled the air. In a massive act of rebellion we went to our chalet for a nice cup of tea and a sit down. Rock and roooooolllll!</div>
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We then went for a brief tootle, and a cuppa, and girded ourselves for the evening ahead. We were seeing the mighty SEPULTURA. As we waited in the loud, booz, and occasionally farty smelling venue, we entertained ourselves by singing along to very rude songs about people being diddled with anchors, and some tenacious D. It was like being a teen again. minus the hormones.</div>
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They were brutally tight, hypnotic and relentless. Absolutely brilliant. We left the venue buzzing with adrenaline, and then retired to the tiny chalet for beer and pizza. Time well spent.</div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Rooooots bloody roooooots!</td></tr>
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A slightly(very) groggy saturday dawned, and it was back from the venue to work for the day. Not rock and roooooooolll! Man I was tired. The car got a bit of damage leaving the venue too, as they have spikey barrier things, and Ruths little car is very low. That wasn't the sort of grinding metal we were hoping for.</div>
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Work day over, cats fed and people showered, we headed back for round two, travelling through snow showers, to the coziness of our home base, now with extra drinking, and delicious enchiladas. Shopping and more heavy metal ensued. I got an alestorm hoodie, some ultra super damned awesome red newrock boots, and a horn tankard to placate my inner viking. I also got mild tinnitus from being musically slapped around by some death metal music. All shopped and musiced out, it was back to base to top up on beer.</div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Booooots, bloody booooots!</td></tr>
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<br />Sunday dawned late, and we all slouched about whilst Ruth gallantly fed us all. Bacon roooooooooooll!<div>
It had snowed a fair bit over night, and as the rest of the crew were heading up north, we parted ways at lunch time. It was honestly one of the best weekends I've had in years, and reminded me there is more to life than work and sleep. Thank you Ruth, Mel, Mike, Craig, and Kelvin the brew master.</div>
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We headed home, and decided to divert via the mountains.</div>
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It really blew the cobwebs away as we looked at frozen waterfalls, and drifting snow sweeping across the valleys below us, the sounds of the world muffled beneath a white blanket. A magical way to end a magical weekend.</div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">snow snow quick quick snow</td></tr>
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creadurhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13296763039067248323noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5329061031270157736.post-69002711733227098882018-03-08T13:39:00.002+00:002018-03-08T13:39:30.933+00:00Muscles, Minty, and marauding moggies. Hi all!<br />
Its been busy busy, and thus this update has been a bit delayed.<br />
Whats been going on? Well a lot of work, gigging with my friends James and Duncan (anarchic and weird folk/metal/ insanity mashup) and just general life really.<br />
The cats have been up to their tricks, as they have received offerings of a light up zoomy ball track, and a cat fountain. The first thing shadow tried to do was pry the top off the fountain and go for a swim. She's crazy about water. She jumps in the sink when you are cleaning your teeth, jumps in the bath at any given opportunity, and just enjoys splashing about in general. I think she may actually be a skinny otter. The zoomy glowy ball track was her second victim. Within a day she'd figured out how to pry the cover off and steal the ball. She is also the only one with paws thi enough to play violently with it, smooshing the ball round the track. Winters mighty boy paws are to muscley, PC is to aloof for it, and prefers dashing madly about the house hunting the ghosts of mice, Minty is interested but her huge clown shoe sized feet won't fit inside the gaps, and Shoe would play with it, but keeps getting jumped by Winter (the douche).<br />
this has been interspersed with fighting through the curtains, and running full tilt around the house. Minty has joined the other girls in their daily circuit training, but her mini legs mean she has to play catch up a lot.<br />
Shoe prefers to sit on her slice of bread cushion, and observe. I think if she could, she would drink coffee and eat a bagel whilst observing.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj4GIWl6IYkylzd8Sa76Dm_adBWYB-s0xXGz0XV_IJL2q9JGp8iIodO1WXlCqdWpyZcZ04Gttw3cpNtri9Eb_rn8XkLEeuZXAAfgVr4nJCa3CNnb8TxI_14EMC3TSJzVTqlo9X2Pp4-4VI/s1600/DSC_0248.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="903" data-original-width="1600" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj4GIWl6IYkylzd8Sa76Dm_adBWYB-s0xXGz0XV_IJL2q9JGp8iIodO1WXlCqdWpyZcZ04Gttw3cpNtri9Eb_rn8XkLEeuZXAAfgVr4nJCa3CNnb8TxI_14EMC3TSJzVTqlo9X2Pp4-4VI/s320/DSC_0248.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Minty finds shadows shennanigans hilarious.</td></tr>
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<br />Speaking of exercise, My friend ben and I got gym memberships! Ben is a muscular man beast anyway, but he wanted a training partner, and as a human butter ball, I decided it was time to shift my fat a bit. I didn't realise how tubby I'd got until I looked at a video of myself on facebook.<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The dreadful duo.</td></tr>
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I must say I was somewhat apprehensive about the whole thing. The last time I set foot in a sports facility I was eighteen, so I was expecting to wake up in hospital after some light exercise, having been judged unworthy by huge muscled men.<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJqvcLZB_dVFGLNQb4nnKTr0q-d4HeXIZxDSXSLCX0AU1ZdSp5NT-HFCJE1Ar_Mq_z-gtmIEHjmfQp_1-D29E1j6vGWWBiPy3s6zmBxD1R2eYQV6Pa4yF8kj5lzGVd2hCGp_lErc0Q8vo/s1600/fotografii_arnolda_shvartseneggera_942211.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1043" data-original-width="1600" height="208" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJqvcLZB_dVFGLNQb4nnKTr0q-d4HeXIZxDSXSLCX0AU1ZdSp5NT-HFCJE1Ar_Mq_z-gtmIEHjmfQp_1-D29E1j6vGWWBiPy3s6zmBxD1R2eYQV6Pa4yF8kj5lzGVd2hCGp_lErc0Q8vo/s320/fotografii_arnolda_shvartseneggera_942211.jpeg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">What I was expecting</td></tr>
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It wasn't like that! After relieving us of most of our money, for membership and swanky gym clothes, we got changed and did a wide array of exercises. I did feel kind of puny next to Ben, but I shall improve. My only cock up was slipping off of one machine, and causing the weights to crash down, getting annoyed looks from the scary muscled man nearby, and deafening myself and Ben. We retreated to the hot tub, which was great but could have been improved by a rum cocktail.<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjyzAF5Ab4BQQownr13-En0qrtIRWdt9VbATS-TYm5VY5b7Kp9qOu7sGRwFzsRDo7EDzilR39Gd087mN_rR4dxSgZcvqTE7HW_Jg38E_9PlAPFwWCezucz4VTwsBiPmDBcpmcKje0sPvNU/s1600/1200x-1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="798" data-original-width="1200" height="212" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjyzAF5Ab4BQQownr13-En0qrtIRWdt9VbATS-TYm5VY5b7Kp9qOu7sGRwFzsRDo7EDzilR39Gd087mN_rR4dxSgZcvqTE7HW_Jg38E_9PlAPFwWCezucz4VTwsBiPmDBcpmcKje0sPvNU/s320/1200x-1.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">How it really was</td></tr>
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I ache like a total sod today. Next time will be better!<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjPtZHYjzsvgT34GeVsnVI6R3pPCmdsrK1IbahZ-i8Oz8i9Dz2QGU7nsn6sFKa-tH48yJFsOX_hHXDd_UIaeglr8ypy5r3pAh5hsbwv5Harbp67VaeoGTveoeQtriJ98Pn2nQUQ3HI3uZs/s1600/Photo+from+Simon+Erridge+%25281%2529.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1130" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjPtZHYjzsvgT34GeVsnVI6R3pPCmdsrK1IbahZ-i8Oz8i9Dz2QGU7nsn6sFKa-tH48yJFsOX_hHXDd_UIaeglr8ypy5r3pAh5hsbwv5Harbp67VaeoGTveoeQtriJ98Pn2nQUQ3HI3uZs/s320/Photo+from+Simon+Erridge+%25281%2529.jpg" width="226" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Me this morning</td></tr>
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In other news, It snowed like a bugger today, and last week I got annoyed with my beard and shaved it off. Now I look younger, sort of!<div>
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speak soooooooon! Simon. xx<br /><div>
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creadurhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13296763039067248323noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5329061031270157736.post-9805693702341662622018-02-15T16:05:00.001+00:002018-02-15T16:05:10.716+00:00It's Minty, not bah humbug.There's never enough cats, so we got another one. Ladies and Gentlemen (and all other genders obviously) meet MINTY!<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjl3RIRMTiptEOek3MuG0afQ_QP-22pBTVBLEXvT0cgrO4th3ttzskXUJAQIUbJh13sEtqt_Cngy5Iz5vXkzHvK6xNfm9Akx_3k8wG8evuE_yFw7xvCFDmZtjXiOEnYf4M1TRW6SkB43lk/s1600/min1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="960" data-original-width="720" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjl3RIRMTiptEOek3MuG0afQ_QP-22pBTVBLEXvT0cgrO4th3ttzskXUJAQIUbJh13sEtqt_Cngy5Iz5vXkzHvK6xNfm9Akx_3k8wG8evuE_yFw7xvCFDmZtjXiOEnYf4M1TRW6SkB43lk/s320/min1.jpg" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I'm happy, honestly.</td></tr>
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We travelled over to Rhyl to meet her, packing many cat treats for the many cats that we were to encounter, and a carry case, on the off chance that we would be coming home with her.<br />
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Cheryl and Jade are lovely people, and totally dote on their various cats and dogs, and Indy the man hating parrot, who started to shriek at me the second I said hello to him. Some parrots just want to watch the world burn. We were assailed by tiny grey kitten that demanded fuss, by their dear three legged cat, and then a little black and white ball of fuzz was bought over to meet us. The ball unfurled to reveal possibly one of the smallest, saddest looking adult cats I have ever seen. It made my heart cry a little bit to see how minute she was. She is about the size of a nine month old kitten. She is three. She came over for some meaty treaties, and calmly and politely devoured them. She then scuttled away and hid under a table, watching warily with those achingly sad eyes. She was very very shy, and a bit jumpy, but clearly curious. Eventually she pottered over and had a fuss and climbed on us a bit. The humans sat around and chatted for a bit, watching various cats slink about, and admiring the new secured garden, upon opening the window to the garden a tsunami of cats flooded in. Big ones, small ones, ginger ones, calicos, black cats. Cats cats cats! Cat heaven! They mobbed the hell out of us for treats and fusses, and even put on a gladiatorial exhibition for us. A sea of twirling happy fur washed about our ankles, chirruping and meowing.<br />
Eventually it came time to leave, and we decided that minty really needed to come home with us.<br />
It was quite emotional for Cheryl and Jade, both of whom had something in their eyes. They've put a lot of love into this cat. There is something special about her.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjz3F1iouxdvAs0U8i8a9Anh_s9PMbv0YP6VGxGYsLlUYjHCPkX6Df43huLN1RyooV6rcjmic2vouEh93c3h88-GtW5dFDc_6j3D6hJw7aG0UdAspCVvxc8MHX6HOvB162qUbLiODp4-Pw/s1600/min2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="900" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjz3F1iouxdvAs0U8i8a9Anh_s9PMbv0YP6VGxGYsLlUYjHCPkX6Df43huLN1RyooV6rcjmic2vouEh93c3h88-GtW5dFDc_6j3D6hJw7aG0UdAspCVvxc8MHX6HOvB162qUbLiODp4-Pw/s320/min2.jpg" width="180" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I dribble.</td></tr>
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She fell asleep with her head in my hand on the way home, and dribbled on it.</div>
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She is really really small, I shall measure her at some point. She weighs virtually nothing, and has extremely short legs and very big ears. She also has massive paws. Prevailing thought is that she has been seriously malnourished since an early age, and it has stunted her growth.</div>
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If you look at her from behind, the black markings on her legs form a little heart.</div>
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Her eyes look sad because she has had a prior infection that has left them droopy. She is also recovering from keratitis, but is mending well.</div>
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When she was spayed, the vet found her uterus was really big, indicating she had several litters of kittens, and when she was rescued she still had big nipples from feeding the little ones.</div>
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Someone out there has been a shit human to this cat. I'm glad I don't work for the RSPCA or cats protection, because arson and being all stabbity is frowned upon.</div>
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She's settling in well, and does love laps, which is awesome. The others have reacted with varying degrees of interest. </div>
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Winter keeps trying to play with her, but for once is being good and backing off when she gets scared.</div>
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Shoe just hisses and growls. To be fair she does that to all the others anyway.</div>
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PC varies between staring like a fuzzy owl, and doing an impression of a theramin. She is a weirdo.</div>
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Splatto is just breezing about like a wafty tube cat, occasionally doing the parroty curious neck thing, but being pretty chill.</div>
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In other news, the broken boiler is fixed, so now our house won't smell like an oil refinery anymore. This pleases us. Winter had been checking to see if the radiators work. apparently they do, because he stayed close to one for so long that his bones melted, and he became cat rope.</div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Go on without me, I'll be fine!</td></tr>
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If you want to follow Minty and her sad eyed musings (mewsings?) she has a facebook page. She insisted she needed one, I don't know why, as she can't read.</div>
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creadurhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13296763039067248323noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5329061031270157736.post-46793108591659107432018-02-09T16:23:00.001+00:002018-02-10T11:33:40.261+00:00Food tester feline and television cat.Life is back to its regular schedule now. Except we had snow! Great flakes blowing about, and clinging to everything, little birdies sitting in the trees looking very unimpressed and waiting for me to refill the feeders, schools closed, buses running slowly! Armageddon! Snowpocalypse!<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjwaeh3S9QwLyPIsNg071R9MM7SXeLQn13DaJnI0uoccE6Yyhjgwwx5g_gtiGZZbYvET6kl1boUuQFBPKGheZdmy4xTGXqCBq0Qi0xmRhXnhR4xfYxQIZ-E4UaKnz2j1XtX6HIsogXocuI/s1600/snoo.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="903" data-original-width="1600" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjwaeh3S9QwLyPIsNg071R9MM7SXeLQn13DaJnI0uoccE6Yyhjgwwx5g_gtiGZZbYvET6kl1boUuQFBPKGheZdmy4xTGXqCBq0Qi0xmRhXnhR4xfYxQIZ-E4UaKnz2j1XtX6HIsogXocuI/s320/snoo.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Went to sleep in Wales, woke up in Skyrim.</td></tr>
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I plowed through it on my way to work, striding against the wind as the mighty snow reached over the soles of my boots. Yup, you guessed it, Britain was bought to its knees by about an inch of the white menace. It wasn't even there by home time, having melted as people looked at it. Those of you who are reading this in the USA, and Russian Federation - or pretty much anywhere that has ever had snow - please feel free to mock us on the total panic that ensues every winter. Its bloody silly, so it is.<br />
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All this cold has meant that the cats have mostly been staying in. Cats all staying in one place leads to trouble. Winter is pretty good with his hoomins, but he is, to be blunt, an absolute douchebag to other cats, with the exception of splatto. It's not that he is nasty, he just wants to play. he does seem to forget that the others are delicate small girl cats, and don't want to have the cat equivalent of playing under 21's rugby with him. He's small, but very muscular. Dense you might say. So he's been hurtling about, in between melting into a semi solid on top of the radiator, impressing them with his acrobatics, and his ability to knock them over.</div>
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Winter "Playyyyyyyy with meeeeee!" (complete with doppler effect, as he is moving at nigh light speed)</div>
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Splatto " HAHA! OK! Wait......OOOOF!" (as The douche cannons into her sending them both flopping all over the place)</div>
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Shoe and PC wait on lofty perches, gently doing stretches and waiting to paff his lordship in the face if he tries anything.</div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEimy1tv_nVoGPnRq3yJ1KyMQkDhOkRWUB4sTFMQwbsyZyREsGpMbDt547JrP30MH1X5xgcOTt1GpzV8kMTDlSXJLXxztyQAPWNzqJtP7ssHHzqynLw9QnV9DTKUSHr-gfHt9CrABe5KOO8/s1600/doosh.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="903" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEimy1tv_nVoGPnRq3yJ1KyMQkDhOkRWUB4sTFMQwbsyZyREsGpMbDt547JrP30MH1X5xgcOTt1GpzV8kMTDlSXJLXxztyQAPWNzqJtP7ssHHzqynLw9QnV9DTKUSHr-gfHt9CrABe5KOO8/s320/doosh.JPG" width="180" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Why they no play? Fine, I shall sit upon this bag of rubbish!</td></tr>
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Meanwhile Shoe has been perfecting her thieving skills. She has a twirly villainous moustache, so it is fitting for her to be a master moocher. Now she needs a lacy eyemask like a lady highwaycat. Her main target is teabags. Yes. Teabags. Ruth reported this shennanigan a couple of weeks ago, and I thought it was a one off, a bit like when PC dragged half a loaf of bread into the living room to indicate she was hungry, but no! Shoe is a pathological thief of tea, (a proper tea leaf, as they would say in London). She is brazen, and doesn't even have the good grace to give us the thin eye, or look guilty. I have video evidence, captured at great peril.<br />
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<a href="https://youtu.be/j2bBOktWWdw" target="_blank">Evidence of larceny</a></div>
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The little sod has been trying it with other things too. She nabbed a slice of cheese (win), has attempted to steal some ginger bread (fail), baked beans (soggy footed fail), and stuck her paw in Ruth's ready brek porridge. That left her looking freaked out at why the hoomin was eating dust.</div>
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PC has decided she is a window, or something. She's taken to sitting on the sound bar, and leaning against the tv because it is warm. This has made subtitles difficult to read, and a lot of the orphan black and vikings characters have been replaced with her fuzzy owly face.</div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I am a viking.</td></tr>
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<a href="https://youtu.be/zO6pDt-sSZI" target="_blank">I am a viking</a><br /><br />
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stay warm and safe folks!<br />
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creadurhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13296763039067248323noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5329061031270157736.post-76380080526967638272018-02-06T16:53:00.002+00:002018-02-06T16:53:42.589+00:00The living and the dead, not the living dead.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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We have been on a bit of a holiday/visit with my parents in that there London, city of a million smells. Mum and dad were most pleased to see us both, as due to crap mental health and poverty, we have not been down in many a long year.<br />
Spent the evening chatting, and then went to bed early as the road trip had been tiring, for Ruth because she was driving, and for me because......actually I have no reason to be tired in cars as I just fall asleep like a toddler after about twenty minutes.<br />
A pleasant yet wet day dawned on saturday, and we went shopping in Dartford. There were ducks to look at, and the place had a nice community feel to it. Been years since I went to a proper London market, all the smells, and stall holders yelling their wares "APPLES EIGHTY PEE A PAAAAAAAAAND" "GIT YER FISH! FRESH 'ADDOCK, LUVERLY".<br />
The evening was spent showing how clever we all were by answering questions on various quiz shows. It was a day that took me back to my childhood.<br />
Sunday.<br />
Sunday was the day when the family descended. Both brother, both sisters in law, and five kids. I fell asleep in the conservatory, only to be woken by my brother Daniel, waving yellow fruit at me, and yelling "Banana penis!". He's forty two. He's also an idiot.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgjxSUbqYMX-zTKeATl5iavu6AxGrcyuj-prqIFqb9rLmbuL1GEtwZhUA67tQVAzYMIJ5Sy_fQ5nsteeyRuf1_j4cZd_wI9MWCVM_mo4F0kQMJmEX4Xgi-eCe-b8iHav8EDHF4D-TEpX_0/s1600/dan.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="903" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgjxSUbqYMX-zTKeATl5iavu6AxGrcyuj-prqIFqb9rLmbuL1GEtwZhUA67tQVAzYMIJ5Sy_fQ5nsteeyRuf1_j4cZd_wI9MWCVM_mo4F0kQMJmEX4Xgi-eCe-b8iHav8EDHF4D-TEpX_0/s320/dan.JPG" width="180" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Like I said. He's an idiot.</td></tr>
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He grabbed a guitar (despite being a total fool, he is an excellent guitarist) and we did some soft rock, and Seth Lakeman songs, which was lovely.<div>
I got to meet my nephews. Joshua, who is as tall as me now, and like a typical teen, had his headphones on, and was watching videos of other people playing computer games, but he smiled and nodded in recognition, Michael, who is a small sandy haired power house, and Jake who is tiny, and hit me in the head with some lego as a greeting.</div>
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Bother two, Stewart, arrived with his family a bit later. His lovely wife Claire was all smiles as usual, and Lilly, their daughter was instantly a whirlwind with michael. She's a charming pixie child, and has the charming wiles of a Bene Gesserit matron mother.</div>
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The youngest, louie, sat and stared owlishly around, occasionally wiggling. He cried when I picked him up.</div>
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I ended up playing under the dining room table with the rest of the kids.</div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhjtzjB0C_JxW_1Qh9jfA52uXmEiiLqUouFoJODOUGn_9M0drfNvRr1yb4InxwCe_fKWwngryz-0Ek7F7yBXaIQS72JnxanRQLp_duAnNGRhlEg_BdkKABL8sgWTXsQDzCkfqJH4Y8azjc/s1600/kids.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="903" data-original-width="1600" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhjtzjB0C_JxW_1Qh9jfA52uXmEiiLqUouFoJODOUGn_9M0drfNvRr1yb4InxwCe_fKWwngryz-0Ek7F7yBXaIQS72JnxanRQLp_duAnNGRhlEg_BdkKABL8sgWTXsQDzCkfqJH4Y8azjc/s320/kids.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">from left, Joshua, Louie, Michael, Lilly, Jake. They look calm now.</td></tr>
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Lilly and Louie seemed to really like Ruth.<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Much fun, and wiggling.</td></tr>
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It was a very loud experience, but so good to catch up. Mum insisted on a photo of her three idiot offspring. the only problem was as soon as we sat next to each other, I pinched Daniels nipple, and Daniel punched Stewart in the nuts.<div>
Brothers never change.</div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEid_Lrg6dwDsOFYFgVCoko4b7c-2vj3CO_arybpKaWrm4nq-eOwbz0c2ZEruqdn9N-dp645q7UKIPe7zx8SfgM-KsowGJVEiYZmfdvWVs-VT4Z6VFEyl56Yjsu6RD5VcINXTeq11MPvcEE/s1600/iduots.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="540" data-original-width="720" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEid_Lrg6dwDsOFYFgVCoko4b7c-2vj3CO_arybpKaWrm4nq-eOwbz0c2ZEruqdn9N-dp645q7UKIPe7zx8SfgM-KsowGJVEiYZmfdvWVs-VT4Z6VFEyl56Yjsu6RD5VcINXTeq11MPvcEE/s320/iduots.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">See how Stewart is protecting himself. <br />And yes, that is a stuffed toy dog on my shoulder. He's called mister woof.</td></tr>
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We slept well.<div>
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Monday was adventure day. Highgate cemetery beckoned ( figuratively speaking, neither Ruth or myself are dead). We hopped aboard the train, and to our surprise, didn't need tickets! We could pay with contactless! Truly we are living in the future.</div>
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The journey was pretty easy, and with a small help from google we made it just in time for our tour.</div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiM91KlBQ-7i6POq3IQgJ8H7-_YxNiCRBKxIhR2mnU9Axftbkdr5RJ9FeaiPmdvwcb1ciGsZ1QSJDjudpqGx_VOHa4cdHvgDXjk697_D3DOH2nPi68TSQ3o8eXsv4ClovwQinoACAbqj_E/s1600/hg+gateway+.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="903" data-original-width="1600" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiM91KlBQ-7i6POq3IQgJ8H7-_YxNiCRBKxIhR2mnU9Axftbkdr5RJ9FeaiPmdvwcb1ciGsZ1QSJDjudpqGx_VOHa4cdHvgDXjk697_D3DOH2nPi68TSQ3o8eXsv4ClovwQinoACAbqj_E/s320/hg+gateway+.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Highgate west gatehouse.</td></tr>
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Highgate west cemetery is gorgeous. Over the years self seeding trees have gradually reclaimed what was once a swathe of grass, transforming the area into a liminal place of dappled shade, with headstones and tombs rising from their midst like so many mayan ruins. The sounds of the city fade away, leaving bird song, rustling leaves, and the squeak and patter of squirrels.</div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Beautiful decay.</td></tr>
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The group went around the cemetery, with a most informative and helpful guide, who told us stories and information about some of the people who now resided beneath us. The was the victorian soldier, whose tomb was shaped like the peninsula he fought upon. The resting place of dissident Alexander Litvinenko, poisoned by the kgb. The first plot to be filled, not by a rich noble, but by a common woman called Elisabeth, whose husband had her interred there so the grave wouldn't get robbed, like his daughters had. The famous british prize fighter who forever lays beneath the effigy of his favourite dog. The ruthless menagerist and self publicist whose last resting place is under a sleepy lion. The man who had the largest horse slaughter business of his day. So many lives past, so many fascinating insights into our history.<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">plot 1 Highgate west.</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjtayKEoOr6fpWEVNh2A4hUZZ9jIgRRdp1tEIOfqxVOPAylujIhVKeJgE6q99cTv_9sd2UaLlP0GOfsRsD6pn4Rlw3yGFj5lO5u8E4X2Opn6ju_hNtSww0-Wlmg_8AFFxicV6evNTBWQVc/s1600/hg5.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="903" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjtayKEoOr6fpWEVNh2A4hUZZ9jIgRRdp1tEIOfqxVOPAylujIhVKeJgE6q99cTv_9sd2UaLlP0GOfsRsD6pn4Rlw3yGFj5lO5u8E4X2Opn6ju_hNtSww0-Wlmg_8AFFxicV6evNTBWQVc/s320/hg5.JPG" width="180" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The catacombs, beautiful but sobering.</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj8lXWbP33zm5rSN2NqSZytAUpKXsS-MowfUGEDwcroBSToQQL4OTzW8zEVOaEIFG5HNY81i4eXJGTiOSlFIDKjk-sJpVPVvPe1f5QU8oTG3rkCeN0iKHsa2WwjKz7U0JPLrS0zYm_jAzw/s1600/hg4.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="903" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj8lXWbP33zm5rSN2NqSZytAUpKXsS-MowfUGEDwcroBSToQQL4OTzW8zEVOaEIFG5HNY81i4eXJGTiOSlFIDKjk-sJpVPVvPe1f5QU8oTG3rkCeN0iKHsa2WwjKz7U0JPLrS0zYm_jAzw/s320/hg4.JPG" width="180" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The circle of Lebanon, not actually in Lebanon.<br />There's a lebanon tree in the middle.</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEic18Xzc2y1kFn3nW8ovXhrQ7VvqKaR5619PVOOiOWs585DobYaBverdHJj4WJz_cQRnYsk_wnXcjTSXLVZUDAzTNSEr6TRp4dI8C2yh53PK2EKip8cnHMsfe2cUCRAhRzJLIcVj8YoUJc/s1600/hg3.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="903" data-original-width="1600" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEic18Xzc2y1kFn3nW8ovXhrQ7VvqKaR5619PVOOiOWs585DobYaBverdHJj4WJz_cQRnYsk_wnXcjTSXLVZUDAzTNSEr6TRp4dI8C2yh53PK2EKip8cnHMsfe2cUCRAhRzJLIcVj8YoUJc/s320/hg3.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The Egyptian avenue. Flashy Victorians were flashy.</td></tr>
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There are rare bats and spiders in the catacombs, and as we made our way around the bats flitted about us, clearly not pleased at strangers trudging through their house. We didn't see the spiders. So that's good.<div>
There were an amazing array of people around us, all gently returning to the soil together, from father of electricity Michael Faraday, to the sad grave of some unnamed teenage prostitutes. </div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi4u7k4AkgjEulCjPvKnCzqxFPw_gPmHAIivcrpZ9Gp-_3FhXgsTOYeMJX6pHbeBlUDBKVaVmbFLZyB2nDP318rKaFL5SWjfvbZMm96wX2VkAFL3bPjVV7JOpcSzkbj3gdNS26cZSQw_ps/s1600/mf.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="903" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi4u7k4AkgjEulCjPvKnCzqxFPw_gPmHAIivcrpZ9Gp-_3FhXgsTOYeMJX6pHbeBlUDBKVaVmbFLZyB2nDP318rKaFL5SWjfvbZMm96wX2VkAFL3bPjVV7JOpcSzkbj3gdNS26cZSQw_ps/s320/mf.JPG" width="180" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">He would be shocked at the size of his gravestone.</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi8Kh3P-9SGZFriBv3STz0HmHdGAMWuCfeTG58IGZiDE7_IpHNRT8bUngEYNkIdLAt22MrOtbG7lxhpXPh6Kwv9B-TnGQUmM4kZ6zD5nF1EU4FPAOfY8NtilNvI-jiicQxufDxOlLJi0Wk/s1600/tp.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="903" data-original-width="1600" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi8Kh3P-9SGZFriBv3STz0HmHdGAMWuCfeTG58IGZiDE7_IpHNRT8bUngEYNkIdLAt22MrOtbG7lxhpXPh6Kwv9B-TnGQUmM4kZ6zD5nF1EU4FPAOfY8NtilNvI-jiicQxufDxOlLJi0Wk/s320/tp.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The empty patch is the last resting place of some victorian child prostitutes.</td></tr>
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<br />It was a long walk round, and my gammy knee was playing up, so we went for lunch. <div>
After a suitably delicious repast it was time to visit the east cemetery. But that is another post.<br /><div>
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creadurhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13296763039067248323noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5329061031270157736.post-89737539142863109352018-01-23T12:41:00.003+00:002018-01-23T12:41:42.832+00:00delayed cats, and buttery bitten fingers.'Ello.<br />
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Subsequent to saturdays post, we didn't get to meet minty the sad eyed cat. Unfortunately, Cheryl was laid low by some inconsiderate virus, and we were advised that the visit was a no go for now. As we are off to that there London for a few days at the end of this week (I've not seen my parent's in about five years - I'm a terrible son), we all thought it would be unfair to bring home a new cat, only to leave her with a cat sitter for the best part of a week. So we will be doing the visitation and adoption when we get back. This also gives me a chance to clean under the bed, where she will no doubt hide.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhtucENgpkAuVTcVggxVrQeXvgCK8Kiav_9fH6JKLtK1Am19pwASOU9xUEjpX-VW8ZvoMcwVPKE-emV7_psfRwGX1UN_EdyFkrqYy0JM9v14LTnPko0vYlmBL7vwPHiZP4ofgQshjiqv5E/s1600/26239061_1717657034964927_8832614668436362399_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="720" data-original-width="960" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhtucENgpkAuVTcVggxVrQeXvgCK8Kiav_9fH6JKLtK1Am19pwASOU9xUEjpX-VW8ZvoMcwVPKE-emV7_psfRwGX1UN_EdyFkrqYy0JM9v14LTnPko0vYlmBL7vwPHiZP4ofgQshjiqv5E/s320/26239061_1717657034964927_8832614668436362399_n.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I want to be sick under your bed.<br /><br /></td></tr>
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Last night we wormed all the cats, apart from the fat floozy sparrow, who wasn't about. It went something like this:<div>
We got the worming tablets, selected two cats each and commenced battle. Ruth chose winter and PC, I got splatto and shoe. Muttering "may the odds be ever in your favour" we got to work. Winter was instantly like " NOPE, I see what you are up to humans, and will have no part of it" and tried promptly to escape. Ruth with lightning reflexes, got hold of him, and after popping the pill in and closing his mouth, coaxed him into swallowing his medicine. He went a bit poofy and stalked away, slightly disgusted with our behaviour.</div>
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I tried the same with splatto, who is a wiggly cat at the best of time. She looked at me asif to say "HELL NO, I just saw what you did to the douche cat, jog on homie" . I got the pill in, she spat it out, I tried again, she spat it out. I tried a third time, she bit me hard on the hand, and then ran like the wind, and stood in the bath shouting "round one to me, shaved monkey butler!" I gave up until a new plan was formulated.</div>
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Meanwhile poor Ruth and PC (who is still a bit nervy - the gods alone know how she was mistreated) were involved in a gentle coaxing struggle to get her to eat her meds. oth were getting saddened by the other. Ruth figured that cats like butter, so the tablet was crushed, and mooshed in with some unsalted butter. The pill was eaten, under duress, but PC ended up with a greasy face, and butter all over her chops, like a three year old with an ice cream. She hid under the bed.</div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I'm ready for you now.</td></tr>
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I tried the same tactic with splatto, who by now was wise to me. She ate the butter, but was not happy about it.</div>
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Shoe was easy. She was sitting atop my armour in a cupboard, and i merely gave her a slice of ham, with the tablet crushed into it. Job done. </div>
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All four of them were most displeased with us, for getting rid of their potential "belly buddies", but if they will go out committing war crimes on mice, what do they expect?</div>
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We were both frazzled too. This was a bad experience for all, and we were both drenched in liquid butter, cat drool, and bits or worming pill. It's not a good look.</div>
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I think next time we will use the spot on drops.<br /><br /></div>
creadurhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13296763039067248323noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5329061031270157736.post-76985089161417930332018-01-20T10:20:00.001+00:002018-01-20T10:20:06.832+00:00Impending kitty visit, and global interest.Its K day! Not K day like in the film pacific rim, as we are not fighting alien monsters in a giant robot, but K as in kitty visit. We will be heading over to Rhyl after work, to visit Cheryl, Jade, their parrot, and a feline swarm, with an eye to taking a very sad eyed cat into our home. I really hope we get along with her (we have decided a name already, "Araminta", if she's in trouble, or just "Minty" if she's being good). Poor wee thing has had a very troubled life, but more on that this evening.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhIukaFLVD3oHRdwrJgA3Om57O_jH42RUMiHlylN5XRcNHDQfytzp3xUTVDdVy0RbOIvvBNgAJxDf3E6fUQDsJuhAdMYsbtdIzF9PRyRtZ2o9zClambx9eZ3Dhdwi4l85nI8P0Qxk0zSQo/s1600/Tresspasser_attacks_Bridge.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="900" data-original-width="1600" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhIukaFLVD3oHRdwrJgA3Om57O_jH42RUMiHlylN5XRcNHDQfytzp3xUTVDdVy0RbOIvvBNgAJxDf3E6fUQDsJuhAdMYsbtdIzF9PRyRtZ2o9zClambx9eZ3Dhdwi4l85nI8P0Qxk0zSQo/s320/Tresspasser_attacks_Bridge.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Not suitable for adoption, Try a cat instead</td></tr>
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I enquired of the fuzzy overlords this morning as to their views on a possible new addition to the herd, they didn't seem too concerned. They were mostly more interested in tripping me up in an attempt to get fed. PC did show some signs of disapproval, by jumping in the litter tray, and hoofing litter all over the floor as I walked past, but that may have just been normal feline disdain for their shaved monkey butler. Comments from them included:<div>
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Winter: "I put my paw in your mouth this morning, that answer should be enough for you. Now feed me."</div>
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Shoe: " I'm Standing on the cooker hob, like I'm not meant to. What of it?"</div>
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Splatto: " Your ankles, I shall twirl around them. Feed me!"</div>
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PC: " This litter? Yeah it's on the floor now. That will teach you. I'm hungry."</div>
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Derp was unavailable for contact because he was at someone else's house, THE HUSSY.<br /><div>
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Elsewhere on the interwebz:<br />Seems like the blog has gained some interest, which I wasn't expecting to be honest, as I ramble on about life as a sentient can opener.</div>
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It seems you good people like it. You are weird, but the good kind of weird. My last post racked up over 330 views in one evening! And the geographical distribution of people blew my mind a bit (not difficult, I get impressed when I eat my dinner without getting it on my top). But I thought that it might serve to illustrate what a fantastically small world we really live on. I have had views from: The USA, UK, Canada, Australia, Ireland, France, The Netherlands, Belgium, Germany, Peru, Russia, Kuwait, Hong Kong, Argentina, and Kenya<span style="color: #222222; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 13px; white-space: nowrap;">.</span></span></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhTct769XahRxuQCePJNfGN9jil6YX2q1AFHV9o5YWv3kHdsJ3_ZeGd2KH3KarTixQ4zbYxiYwb_FrSuNTORdv5C9YtbWcQE1fJtCZCfQncGnEtD2jcapzYAaVjRcNlutNleWPGqgS6blU/s1600/5.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1200" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhTct769XahRxuQCePJNfGN9jil6YX2q1AFHV9o5YWv3kHdsJ3_ZeGd2KH3KarTixQ4zbYxiYwb_FrSuNTORdv5C9YtbWcQE1fJtCZCfQncGnEtD2jcapzYAaVjRcNlutNleWPGqgS6blU/s320/5.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">My face, it was a bit like this when I read the stats.</td></tr>
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<span style="color: #222222; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 13px; white-space: nowrap;">This is very cool, and totally unexpected, and I thank you all.</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #222222; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 13px; white-space: nowrap;">Now, I have things to do, so enjoy your day people of the world, and I shall update you this evening.</span></span></div>
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creadurhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13296763039067248323noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5329061031270157736.post-22007154898173229972018-01-18T12:19:00.001+00:002018-01-18T12:19:43.843+00:00Well good gods above! It's me and I'm back!<br />
Sooooooooo..... it is now 2018, and we are living in the future. The future is very much like the past, except some stuff has changed. America has a scary orange man in charge of it, Britain has shot itself in the foot and decided europe smells, the middle east is still burning, Russia has been very naughty in the Crimea, and North Korea has allegedly developed some very big fireworks. Tumultuous times.<br />
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It's also been about four years since I posted anything here.<br />
"How are you Simon?" I bet few of you are asking. Well, the reply I will give you is "pretty ok actually, thanks".<br />
Things have changed a fair bit in my life. My daughter (you remember her, the gothy girl, who I pretended was a vampire on account of her aversion to daylight) has moved off to university, and is doing well.<br />
My wife and I are still together, and although times have been pretty rough on us both, we are working through stuff.<br />
I have got a job too! My opening gambit to my now boss was " GIVE ME A JOB, FOR F**KS SAKES!" and it seemed to work. I like working, working gives me purpose, and purpose makes me a better person ( The new meds help too). Having money is nice too.<br />
The only downside is I am still in a lot of pain with my back, and my eyesight makes things awkward quite often.<br />
All has changed with the cats. Mystery succumbed to his car related injuries, The marmalade nightmare (Mr Pie) got old and creaky, and just stopped working one evening. He died with us all sitting around him, being fussed, and is buried next to Mystery.<br />
Mim is sadly no longer with us either. She'd been looking a bit peaky, so we made an appointment to have her checked up on at the vets. We came down the next morning, and she couldn't walk. We rushed her in to the surgery, and were told the worst, she had a saddle thrombosis, and the only kind thing to do was have her put to sleep. We were shocked and heartbroken. We miss her very much, our sunburst kitten. I'm sure she's eating mouse faces, and raising heck in the kitty afterlife. We buried her next to the boys. The dream team reunited.<br />
Sparrow (the stray who stayed) is still a fatty fat fat fat, and is mooching food from all the neighbours. He's sort of moved out, and comes to visit, smelling of mackerel and strangers perfume. He's incorrigible, lardy, and complainy, but ever so cuddly.<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">full of festive spirit</td></tr>
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Winter the stripy douche cat happened along, we were terribly sad, and kitten broody, and wanted a new furry friend. W saw the picture of this tiny boss eyed kitten that a friends mum had, and before you know it, we were driving to Nottingham to get him. He is an inquisitive little fellow, and likes watching videos of birdies on you tube. He's still stripey, and into everything. He has recently taken to biting my nipples to wake me up in the morning. He's a funny little dude, and a ray of sunshine.</div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiIvE4IOMunvhyxunclEIYUVquWpoqJkgz7BuVVWrcUkk1r3ku8J7UK6J55kO9aULdcPLGyUV7kG3QofFkB-axKanzafzs1VWXB6LiRwDujF08KssMUmFlVaQ6t8mZe5SldxEwJSOyVAE4/s1600/wintree.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1080" data-original-width="1080" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiIvE4IOMunvhyxunclEIYUVquWpoqJkgz7BuVVWrcUkk1r3ku8J7UK6J55kO9aULdcPLGyUV7kG3QofFkB-axKanzafzs1VWXB6LiRwDujF08KssMUmFlVaQ6t8mZe5SldxEwJSOyVAE4/s320/wintree.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Winter, stuck in a tree</td></tr>
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We have new cats! Three whole cats! (maybe a fourth very soon - watch this space)<br />
First off, after mim died, we were bereft, and cat broody. Ruth spotted a rescue cat that we both liked the look of, and so we contacted the shelter. It is a small privately run place, operated by a lovely lady called Cheryl, and her daughter Jade, who take in the waif and strays, and give them love, food and a chance at a new life. Does that sound like a witness protection scheme for moggies? I think it does, as we know they are all guilty of something. Anyway. They came to visit us, to check we were of sound mind and loving disposition. We passed at least 50% of that test, and so came into receipt of a timid little black and white, three year old girl, called twilight. We didn't like the name, and so renamed her twiglet. She's small and skinny, scared, with a baldy side from her neutering. I commented that she was about the size of my shoe. She is now called shoe. She will only answer to shoe. She lords it over all others by sitting atop the freezer and demanding fusses. her main hobbies include licking hands, headbutting things, playing whilst no one is looking, and punching winter in the face.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhxD92DmRomHO7HHzShp6K1w7_4jxZ5jWa6jiZFzJWoOFyNWo4_o2VkGYx9Aij8IJMBmnJp5tqRateC_XiQ9drkOGBP-5Vi19M4jJkVvWhKon4Yy45Ec8ra_IjOmdCpyrcVT0gniEMAyEM/s1600/shoe.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="720" data-original-width="540" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhxD92DmRomHO7HHzShp6K1w7_4jxZ5jWa6jiZFzJWoOFyNWo4_o2VkGYx9Aij8IJMBmnJp5tqRateC_XiQ9drkOGBP-5Vi19M4jJkVvWhKon4Yy45Ec8ra_IjOmdCpyrcVT0gniEMAyEM/s320/shoe.jpg" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Ready for her job at the business factory.</td></tr>
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<br />We were happy with derp, winter, and shoe. However, there's always more cats who need a home. Enter shadow (also answers to splatto). She is a year old, and came to us from Cheryl and JAde, from a home where her and a fellow furry feline were being neglected and possibly abused. Initially we thought she was a he. She is a skinny wiry girl, as active as Winter, and more destructive. Water is her thing. She loves jumping in an empty used bath to warm her toes, and playing with dripping taps, running taps, flushing toilets (gross). I've nearly peed on her head more than once. All boxes are hers. ALL OF THEM!<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhsQyHtF-OFtbSvLs47il3Iq8WuAH9K7fH9dGZ_zzIvbb-rscgpzCol_oO1nizaQ360FYDCKo2QaYYmLvYpwhK6QYcrGfwF5L2yr1WBzJKnevhLd1-396iAul2_NDGo4IYf-9jlL4oETP8/s1600/spkatt.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="720" data-original-width="540" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhsQyHtF-OFtbSvLs47il3Iq8WuAH9K7fH9dGZ_zzIvbb-rscgpzCol_oO1nizaQ360FYDCKo2QaYYmLvYpwhK6QYcrGfwF5L2yr1WBzJKnevhLd1-396iAul2_NDGo4IYf-9jlL4oETP8/s320/spkatt.jpg" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">something requires my attention</td></tr>
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NO MORE CATS. WE HAVE REACHED CATPACITY (see what I did there? - clever, right?)<div>
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Cat number five. Meet Princess Caroline, named in honour of the pink media mogul from the "Bojack Horseman" cartoon. She was the other cat that was rescued alongside splatto. Timid to the point of being a recluse, all I saw of her for the first week was a pair of owly yellow eyes from under a bed. She was so stressed she over groomed her whole back end, rendering herself bald, apart from charming little puffs of fluff on her shins, like leg warmers, and her huge bushy tail.</div>
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She's settled a lot now, and is getting furry again, gentle and friendly, and loves playing zoomies about the house with shadow. Tolerates shoe, hates winter, is terrified of the furry dump truck that is derp. She loves sitting on the to of the banisters, staring and staring at us with those lampy eyes. Also known as PC, and soot sprite. may be in love with Ruth, as she follows her everywhere, including the toilet, bath and bed.</div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhzU1QloCHFlLo8tv2w9V2I4_4IwOxi7sXx67kJ0hlcTbOJagGnVfvFAdpiNcifqPeFwtNFar1a0g6EpXM-HjmZBokIuAfTkYKXaHb6EhSkzBFurJcDPKYuuAkYLst0ZmThe42Tx2E6Vc8/s1600/pc.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="720" data-original-width="405" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhzU1QloCHFlLo8tv2w9V2I4_4IwOxi7sXx67kJ0hlcTbOJagGnVfvFAdpiNcifqPeFwtNFar1a0g6EpXM-HjmZBokIuAfTkYKXaHb6EhSkzBFurJcDPKYuuAkYLst0ZmThe42Tx2E6Vc8/s320/pc.jpg" width="180" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I iz a catserole.</td></tr>
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<br />So there we have it. a new brood of misfit loners, with a background.<div>
Watch this space, we are going to meet another waif on saturday.</div>
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It's good to be back.</div>
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S.<br /><div>
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creadurhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13296763039067248323noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5329061031270157736.post-4054320132068456342014-09-11T15:59:00.002+00:002014-09-11T15:59:29.609+00:00It has been too longI'm going to keep this blog open, but, I probalbly won't be posting on it very often. Well for a while anyway.<br />
I lost my painting mojo. The stress and anxiety of dealing with the DWP have affected me very deeply, and I just can't get into the headspace to enable me to paint. This has been going on since, well, since I last posted.<br />
In addition, mystery the cat recently died, and the place doesn't seem the same without him.<br />
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Don't write me off though, Im sure I'll bounce back eventually.<br />
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Thank you to all the people who have read, and hopefully enjoyed my posts. The short time that the blog was running full pelt, it racked up close to 7000 views, and lots of lovely comments.<br />
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Here is hoping I find my feet again.<br />
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S.creadurhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13296763039067248323noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5329061031270157736.post-55478225551234881402013-04-14T19:31:00.000+00:002013-04-14T19:31:05.018+00:00Angry chair is also grouchy turtleHello.<br />
Its been a while. Winter is over and spring is now sort of doing spring related stuff, with flowers, rain, and the occasional bee.<br />
This means winter no longer has me hibernating quite so much. That's the awful thing with depression, when you're down it makes you down-er, and when you're up it makes you, well, sort of flat. No amount of daylight box and pills have been able to drag me out of myself enough to really do much for the past few months. Hence my lack of posting here.<br />
"So Simon, whats being going on other than you being a basket case?" I hear you ask. Well, when the weather allowed, when my poor old mangled back allowed, and when my own brain allowed, I have mostly been taking pictures. I wanted to paint a lot, but didn't have the energy, or spirit. I have two paintings half finished, and sitting looking accusingly at me. I shall tackle them soon, then get on with some spring stuff. I might paint some flowers.<br />
New year came and went, largely un noticed. Snow came and stayed, and then went, and then came back again, and the roof got blown off of the work shed.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjd04TruLaRFj8K_OpCNpbYe_gMQoPiB1k3V0ly6R2H5sLbPl-UR1uEGi7Yjj6NwUaiUYsBmZLkYCMlKPkO9IQIrQ3URKnbP7Y8v7lXCvF2Ml3gQ9aSd_7L6zBtnD_fVzITanPIpgYqvC0/s1600/903939_10151822071759689_1113471038_o.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjd04TruLaRFj8K_OpCNpbYe_gMQoPiB1k3V0ly6R2H5sLbPl-UR1uEGi7Yjj6NwUaiUYsBmZLkYCMlKPkO9IQIrQ3URKnbP7Y8v7lXCvF2Ml3gQ9aSd_7L6zBtnD_fVzITanPIpgYqvC0/s320/903939_10151822071759689_1113471038_o.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Gee, thanks nature, you dick.</td></tr>
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One excellent piece of news was that I was declared all free of brain tumour. Apparently "junior" has all been reabsorbed into my body. This is a weight off of my mind. Literally. It seems i do have sinus disease though, which will probably need operating on, and I am going t the opthalmologists in may, to asses if im partially sighted enough to be counted as partially sighted.<br />
Ruth and I celebrated at OK diner, ate like gods, and drank million dollar peanut milkshakes, peanut flavour. I think the shakes are made by Tolkein elves. They are that tasty.<br />
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Ruth rescued a slow worm that strayed out thinking that it was spring <slow worms don't have calenders, and they would be useless to them, as 1. they can't read, and 2. they have no fingers to turn the pages.> It got put in a box over night, and was released into our neighbours garden the next day, into some very slow worm friendly straw with a big warm slate on top.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitF5XUx4W2lE2jebbY5a4F5Lo-wUsJmWI1kFgQFU84c5Zx7D9NvqepWe0tYEJ6DgoaCiNbRKsb5ejSKzVmcK-62MWn4DIYSUbdCf0zFDERrvrZD9p89nrhmC91VhVvodRNVgfUMjGBS2Y/s1600/IMG_2399.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitF5XUx4W2lE2jebbY5a4F5Lo-wUsJmWI1kFgQFU84c5Zx7D9NvqepWe0tYEJ6DgoaCiNbRKsb5ejSKzVmcK-62MWn4DIYSUbdCf0zFDERrvrZD9p89nrhmC91VhVvodRNVgfUMjGBS2Y/s320/IMG_2399.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">March you say? whoops I look stupid.</td></tr>
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We celebrated Ruth's birthday yesterday, with a trip to Bodnant gardens in the conwy valley. Beautiful rambling gardens, great for a relaxing walk, even in the rain. Yes it rained, and we all got soggy, but it was wonderful, and Ruth and I loved it. Not sure about Meleri, but she came along too.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhEy-Q8_wHMHfOJjjEhk_l2iMlS09Q4pDNw9g_-neYWLvnDyUyKAdCdA7pYo977a99Qf8fyeeAtcnc-vgbOpl7niUQ4pfmpcRUfKxfmoODPRPTBq2dVpNOO_NnLzjUptnQBig0bJn8uZqc/s1600/IMG_2714.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhEy-Q8_wHMHfOJjjEhk_l2iMlS09Q4pDNw9g_-neYWLvnDyUyKAdCdA7pYo977a99Qf8fyeeAtcnc-vgbOpl7niUQ4pfmpcRUfKxfmoODPRPTBq2dVpNOO_NnLzjUptnQBig0bJn8uZqc/s320/IMG_2714.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Birthday Girl!</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhmI41cC6nm5XI4NxT9DjvRbDCqiKiBEXMKtv8NM8TUD1pQ1PfaGcuMHFeZJNqOjfqtfLorOYmGq1Zc6WKclh2pmIPxsWE5hmwhysQf09ag3CYyasouSuSk7EW2MSXWhkPBgS959tVI1h4/s1600/IMG_2716.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhmI41cC6nm5XI4NxT9DjvRbDCqiKiBEXMKtv8NM8TUD1pQ1PfaGcuMHFeZJNqOjfqtfLorOYmGq1Zc6WKclh2pmIPxsWE5hmwhysQf09ag3CYyasouSuSk7EW2MSXWhkPBgS959tVI1h4/s320/IMG_2716.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Damp daughter</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgobXYVQ4xGgiL10ugmj57r-1QpF6hDtUGh6KvsQrRlTjuOe9O2dAz4D5zhZFZ-eVFMbB4bh2SWeNP7-SwBBSbSPYAMcqNBqxPAeFvWOuvlD0Ntma_s6HLQ9WcOCD4thhbjAdSh2zK1Ekw/s1600/IMG_2733.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgobXYVQ4xGgiL10ugmj57r-1QpF6hDtUGh6KvsQrRlTjuOe9O2dAz4D5zhZFZ-eVFMbB4bh2SWeNP7-SwBBSbSPYAMcqNBqxPAeFvWOuvlD0Ntma_s6HLQ9WcOCD4thhbjAdSh2zK1Ekw/s320/IMG_2733.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">some of Bodnants excellent water features</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiYdKO-CRhNSTAsDa5fZOYEeDV9QttffShmPSvdNjew6moG9PNDzRQa3zEYsqg439nXUqr7T3ByWQx1E0XJPSLwyMlEygeq92yIiNsEgiDTVAJZfyDJLEvSQM3pOY9jO01Lte961XDQwTI/s1600/IMG_2734.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiYdKO-CRhNSTAsDa5fZOYEeDV9QttffShmPSvdNjew6moG9PNDzRQa3zEYsqg439nXUqr7T3ByWQx1E0XJPSLwyMlEygeq92yIiNsEgiDTVAJZfyDJLEvSQM3pOY9jO01Lte961XDQwTI/s320/IMG_2734.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Lovely Ruth, looking quissically at her soaked husband.</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh5rFaJLH-GZtfPKGAUARTsUhXZE-oDxq_V4ilnLI2Y7mLE3GiTn5eTKeyGdPFmfeAb_3itMKXCbibWh0oD4x0S3RbYDY10zSea3EUAJMuFxgaQgyLYUUPKaxMz-nSu4Y50dUFUkztykIA/s1600/IMG_2735.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh5rFaJLH-GZtfPKGAUARTsUhXZE-oDxq_V4ilnLI2Y7mLE3GiTn5eTKeyGdPFmfeAb_3itMKXCbibWh0oD4x0S3RbYDY10zSea3EUAJMuFxgaQgyLYUUPKaxMz-nSu4Y50dUFUkztykIA/s320/IMG_2735.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Meleri. Not smiling.</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgPMGnGLyfhw5Ac9ci2J2aqprbi6rQ31e0ZXxZHjhK6JMNLL2yV_wkESfvpmuvjHPXjmd85ydOSGQFBT4dRWSYNA8Yl-Ga0FDtQ4oCrjd71-YyEd_GlwvX9u_hd26oiGwp0FbUUmaOdDVI/s1600/IMG_2749.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgPMGnGLyfhw5Ac9ci2J2aqprbi6rQ31e0ZXxZHjhK6JMNLL2yV_wkESfvpmuvjHPXjmd85ydOSGQFBT4dRWSYNA8Yl-Ga0FDtQ4oCrjd71-YyEd_GlwvX9u_hd26oiGwp0FbUUmaOdDVI/s320/IMG_2749.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Macro of a wet flower.</td></tr>
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We seem to also have inherited a stray cat.<br />
He has been dubbed "Sparrow" or "pirate cat" on account of the awful injuries to his face that have left his left eye all squinty and "Arrrr" looking.<br />
He showed up one afternoon, limping and oozing grossness from various infections, so we treated him with hot salt water < brave> and fed him. This carried on for a few days until he upped and left. I ended up putting flyers through all the doors in our village looking for him. He, of course, sauntered back in totally unconcerned a few days later.<br />
He is very sweet, not desperately clever, and unneutered < which we are going to fix for him> He gets on well with mystery, but fights with mim, and is HATED By Mr Pie. This is due to his scroungy nature. The Apricot horror has been out scrounged!<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhNcwa1WOn9crFH45e_8asYoiAx0uRPx0IAdTLuNjJyN_1HGkwBF64zWsBI-HfcLXok4lX5qRzGKJsJ-IwKOSJCltUeAaG8LA4KfyG2uCvJEB_84ZEEMhg15CTYXi0IrzVXbwgCvYGtSu0/s1600/pirate.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhNcwa1WOn9crFH45e_8asYoiAx0uRPx0IAdTLuNjJyN_1HGkwBF64zWsBI-HfcLXok4lX5qRzGKJsJ-IwKOSJCltUeAaG8LA4KfyG2uCvJEB_84ZEEMhg15CTYXi0IrzVXbwgCvYGtSu0/s320/pirate.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Duuuuuuuuuuuuuuuh! Food! arrrrrr!</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQDu1jJyQw8fPdpQM39mnbhi5-HaNvxK04o0oK7GdPLnlMPlXp_EW5keMhInXl1YU_M0annBUTitwRl1A-xgwmNjlCGEei52aGEsi9hYYZuUJikm9r9e9qX_1YKL0BNTVpJXY0I0SBimU/s1600/IMG_2383.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQDu1jJyQw8fPdpQM39mnbhi5-HaNvxK04o0oK7GdPLnlMPlXp_EW5keMhInXl1YU_M0annBUTitwRl1A-xgwmNjlCGEei52aGEsi9hYYZuUJikm9r9e9qX_1YKL0BNTVpJXY0I0SBimU/s320/IMG_2383.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Its ON! I have my war hat.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
This has lead to a new phenomenon. The angry chair. Pie sits beneath one of the chairs in the living room, one that has a throw over it, making a cave, and growls like a rusty door every time sparrow goes near.<br />
<br />
Sparrow " Herp a durp fuss! food! arrrr!"<br />
Pie <from hiding> "sodoffsodoffsodoff - I will cut you! so help me I will shank you in your face!"<br />
Sparrow "huuuuur, indoors, warm lap! fuss! sleep! arrrrr!"<br />
Pie "all the food is miiiiiiiiiiiiiiiine! go ! go now! and take your splendid testicles with you! I shall sit under this chair til you do"<br />
<br />
Only when He is sure that the interloper is out of sight does he poke his scowling face from its hiding place. His head emerges from beneath the throw, and he pokes his baldy old neck out as long as it will go, to have a good look about. This is the grouchy turtle.<br />
<br />
<b>Sparrow:</b><br />
<b>A.K.A </b>Pirate cat, plums<br />
<b>Appearance:</b> Dopey lopsided face, yellow eyes medium sized, soft black fur, with a white bowtie, and a squinty look.<br />
<b>Demeanour:Very talkativ</b>e, prone to heebing, mimping and mooching. Very friendly, unless you are mim or Pie, when he will try to ignore you. Likes laps.<br />
<b>Territory: </b>Has a small colony on the bed. Likes to sleep under the oak tree, own the back wall.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
Thats it for now, will post again soon! promise. <br />
<br />
<br />
<br />creadurhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13296763039067248323noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5329061031270157736.post-13538025370190689332012-12-29T22:19:00.002+00:002012-12-30T00:48:01.756+00:00Ringing in a new year. Wringing the neck of the old one.Hello everyone.<br />
<br />
Well, 2012 has been a topsy turvy year. Some good, some not so good, and some, quite frankly , bloody crappy bits. My plans for world domination have been temporarily put on hold, partly due to my own brain subverting my efforts. I'm still hanging in there, but the rise to a painting super power has been delayed, but not stopped.<br />
Recharging my batteries over christmas, in the wilds of North Yorkshire, has been wonderful, as I have been able to explore new places, camera in hand, and shoot a load of interesting things. I quite like non fatally shooting wildlife.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/Untitled-1copy_zps5ae9578f.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="200" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/Untitled-1copy_zps5ae9578f.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">BLAM! errrr..I mean....CLICK!</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
Our menagerie of cats has probably not even noticed our absence, as the veteran cat slave, and all round excellent friend James Phillips was looking after them. So I have little to report of their activities, other than a text confirming that they poo like champions. They make me proud, even if Mim has developed a nip habit..<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/nipcatmim-Copy_zpse61a2c1f.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="213" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/nipcatmim-Copy_zpse61a2c1f.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Out of her tiny tiny mind.</td></tr>
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We have been unfaithful with other cats though! We met our friends Marc and Rebecca's cats, Professor tinycat, and Peaches. Both of whom are adorable. The prof likes sleeping on people, and clawing nostrils, whereas Peaches is a tiny mimlish trifle hunter.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/huggytiny-Copy_zps2617e9a7.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="212" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/huggytiny-Copy_zps2617e9a7.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">MY human NOW! Ahhh hahahahahaha.</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/proftc_zpsfcd168a1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="212" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/proftc_zpsfcd168a1.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">MINE!</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/peaches-Copy_zps4e4048e0.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="212" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/peaches-Copy_zps4e4048e0.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">All your cream based foods NOW, or people will get hurt.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
I should add them to the role call of our overlords.<br />
<br />
<b>Greyling:</b><br />
A.KA: professor tinycat, ohmygodheissocute.<br />
<b>Appearance: </b>Small golden eyed, black kitten with white chest, soft white paws with delicate pinky pads, and professorial white whiskers.<b><br /></b><br />
<b>Demeanor: </b>Cute and playful, prone to random sleeping, and launching himself unexpectedly at someones chin/beard nostril lining, without any apparent provocation.<b><br /></b><br />
<b>Territory:</b> Mostly laps and shoulders.<b></b><br />
<b><br /></b>
<b><br /></b>
<b><br />Peaches: </b><br />
<b>A.K.A </b>She looks like she will be trouble when she's older. The explorer.<br />
<b>Appearance: </b>A minute dark queen of pain in waiting. Peachy pink nose and a stripe of orange down her face, like she is breathing fire out of her nose. Dainty paws hide razor like weapons.<br />
<b>Demeanour: </b>Layed back, licky, and adventurous. She seems to enjoy torturing humans with her needle claws and razor teeth. Will attempt to procure any cream based desserts in a several meter radius. Given to deep rumbling noises, that may be pleasure or brewing danger.<br />
<b>Territory: </b>Peoples laps, any surface she can reach, trifle bowls.<br />
<br />
<br />
Our time in the north included several trips to the wonderful whitby, including my birthday, where we went to <a href="http://www.misterchipswhitby.co.uk/" target="_blank">MISTER CHIPS</a>, possibly the best chippy ever, and ate until we were well and truly overhaddocked. Whitby abbey was, as always, magnificent, if a bit wet.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/whitbyabbey_zpse18f96c0.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="212" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/whitbyabbey_zpse18f96c0.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">One abbey, saturated.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
Ruth and Meleri seemed to have a great time too, everywhere we went, and it was lovely spending christmas with my daughter, the first in sixteen years. Even her sprouty emissions were bearable.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/rumelbridge_zps5082b672.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="213" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/rumelbridge_zps5082b672.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Two girls, one bridge.</td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"></td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"></td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br /></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
This is actually the bridge that Ruth and I had our wedding pictures taken on, all those moons ago.<br />
<br />
Anyway, back to bangor and angry/indifferent/smelly cats, and normaility tomorrow, then world domination shall swing into full flow again.<br />
<br />
Wishing you you all the best for the new year. May 2013 bring all your wishes but one.<br />
<br />
<br />
Simon.<br />
<br />creadurhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13296763039067248323noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5329061031270157736.post-3736111674206728332012-11-18T14:13:00.004+00:002012-11-18T14:13:49.380+00:00six weeks - no post - RECTIFIED. Massively remiss of me I know." What has happened in the past six weeks" I hear you cry, dear reader. Well. On the human front, I have been falling to pieces. Lack of money, cold weather, dark days, and household stresses have been taking their toll,and I have been kind of mentally off line. Things are a bit brighter the past few days, but I'm still under the cosh of winter, ATOS, and general worry about things.<br />
On the upside, I do have some bits to keep me busy, and some prospective comissions, so thats a plus.<br />
I have also been toying with comic art. It is something I have always loved, from the time I used to get imported marvel and dc comics, all lurid colours and fuzzy print, with ads for xray specs, and hostess twinkies in the middle. Just thinking about them evokes the smell of cheaply printed paper.<br />
I have a couple of friends in "the trade" <a href="http://www.tonylee.co.uk/" target="_blank">Tony Lee</a> , and <a href="http://bombculture.com/" target="_blank">Anthony Jones</a>, and threy have inspired me to have a bash in this field.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/nahiossi2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/nahiossi2.jpg" width="207" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Me, as a comic character.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
I know its far from perfect, but, its a start.<br />
The workshop now has a heater, so I can stay out there into the evening, to the pleasure of Mim, and possibly the rest of the household. <Mim likes it out there><br />
Meleri has turned eighteen. I know this was inevitable, unless I had her frozen in carbonite, but it still made me feel old. As part of the birthdayness, we took her to see nightwish, which also made me feel old, with all the pretty young people next to my begoggled beardyness, but it was a great gig, and even though i was hopped up on big painkillers for it <as usual> we had a fine old time.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/DSC_0366.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="180" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/DSC_0366.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Its nightwish!</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/DSC_0362.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="180" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/DSC_0362.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">beauty and the duck faced beast.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/DSC_0358.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="180" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/DSC_0358.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Kids are never impressed by ANYTHING.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
Halloween was also a great time down at the Tap and Spile, for our yearly shindig. Ruth went as sally, Meleri as a broken doll, and me as a were badger. I won the best cozzy <yay>, although i thought Ruth should have.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/304318_10151505574324689_1628717107_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="213" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/304318_10151505574324689_1628717107_n.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Totally cool.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/DSC_0326.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="180" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/DSC_0326.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Broken dolls are never impressed by ANYTHING.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/DSC_0325.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="180" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/DSC_0325.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">badgers badgers badgers badgers.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
We also have a new car. Ruths VW was crashed into and written off. She was ok though, which is the important bit, but did sustain whiplash injuries, and has to have physio. The new car is shiny black, a peugeot, and looks like it wants to head butt someone. It has been named.....The catmobile.<br />
<br />
Speaking of cats....<br />
WE noticed the queen of pain was off her food, but thought it was her just being a mardy arse, as she now has claimed Meleri's bedroom, and lurks there like a fuzzy dragon, gaurding her horde of dirty laundry. After a day or so I was fussing her <Mim, not Meleri> when i noticed a swelling on her neck. She had a HUGE abscess, hidden by her face fluff. To the vets we went, he was impressed by the size of the lump and was going to excise it the next day. Mim thought differently. she went upstairs, lay on our bed, and clawed it open. All over our bed. It was probable revenge for making her go to the vet. It was also disgusting..like..... some deleted scene from alien. Ruth cleaned it up, in her nursing manner, and the next day it was treated. The main downside was trying to give Mim her antibiotics. Ruth manages it ok, but Mim turns into a growling bag of needle sharp rage if I try. My wounds are now healing well.<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/DSC_0341.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="180" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/DSC_0341.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">My new bio weapon! pew pew! squirt!</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
Mr Pie is still sleeping on my chest at every opportunity, and has resumed hostilities with Lord Heebus, who paffs him into his rightful place every time he gets uppity.<br />
<br />
Pie "Check my skills out! Ninja! PCHOW! HI_YAAAAA!"<br />
Mystery "paff"<br />
Pie "Well played, well played"<br />
*Mystery looks smug*<br />
*Pie sneezes*<br />
Mim "I Kiiiiillll you"<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/DSC_0271.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="180" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/DSC_0271.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Gah! Pie attack!</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/DSC_0268.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="180" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/DSC_0268.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">In my head, I am a fierce warrior.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/DSC_0381.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="180" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/DSC_0381.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I kill you all.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
Finally. My little resident, the comma butterfly, decided to go outside and fend for itsself over winter. Fare the well and see you in the spring. I will miss it sitting on the wall by my paper storage.<br />
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<a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/DSC_0382.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="180" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/DSC_0382.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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More updates soon. Honest.<br />
creadurhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13296763039067248323noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5329061031270157736.post-8248382435275732532012-09-21T11:57:00.000+00:002012-09-21T11:57:02.779+00:00Royal dignity fail. It's curtains for the workshop.Autumn! That season of mellow fruitfulness, and bloody cold workshops, is nigh, if not upon us already. So it is time to put soft furnishy bits in the workshop, to keep out the chill winds that blow. So my project for next week will be getting some form of curtains fitted. I'm thinking maybe the enormous Celtic patterned hanging I am in possession of, might be a winning plan. If It is so, I shall post pics here. Everything is almost in place, just need deskage, storage, and I'm good to go.<br />
Also, some form of butterfly has decided to make its home on the front of the workshop, so when it emerges, I shall have a little butler. I will get it to make me cups of tea, and stuff.<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/IMG_1477_zpscaa43054.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="213" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/IMG_1477_zpscaa43054.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Milk, no sugar? Very good sir. Also I am disguised as a leaf.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
To get Meleri out of the house and into some fresh air <cos she's a teenager, and they appear to prefer watching tv to being in the scary outside>, I dragged her out to the nature reserve down by white bridge. She dressed like a goth, <a good look for wandering through muddy woods>, I dressed like an explorer/wildlife type/trampy dad. Camera, and camera phone <mock ye not, modern camera phones can actually get some really good shots that take much longer with a traditional camera> in hand, we crept stealthily round the woods. My thought was to get some shots of mushrooms/berries/autumnyness. Its a bit early for 'shrooms to be in full bloom, which is probably why none were seen, proving I'm not a fungi to be with <fungi..fun guy...geddit?...> But I did get some nice fruit pics, and even did some "arty" shots. I will be painting the various berries, for seasonal cards mainly. <br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/IMG_1464_zpsf220fe7a.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="213" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/IMG_1464_zpsf220fe7a.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Pretty, but not advisable to eat.</td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"> </td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"> </td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"> </td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"> </td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"> </td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/IMG_1404_zps0dd7f8fb.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="213" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/IMG_1404_zps0dd7f8fb.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Tree stump, or mystic fortress? Yeah....tree stump.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/IMG_1418_zpsd017b44e.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="213" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/IMG_1418_zpsd017b44e.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I like the contrast.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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Meleri seemed to like the walk, even though she hissed like a cat and hid her face whenever the sun came out.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/stinkpire_zps6cab9abd.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/stinkpire_zps6cab9abd.jpg" width="276" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Children of the night, how they love to....slouch.....watching...... repeats of the big bang theory.</td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br /></td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br /></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
Talking of hissing cats...........<br />
Mim, queen of pain, mistress of all roofs, destroyer of mouse faces, paffer supreme, and terroriser of other cats has claimed a newly discovered piece of territory! The ream of basketonia-under-table. A fluffy sheepskinny land, where wicker and purring abounds. She has been setting up court there for a couple of days now, and neither of the other two seem to be interested in staking a claim. Although Mr Pie does lurk on the edge sometimes, as it affords him a good view of Mims feeding place in the bathroom.<br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/DSC_0265_zps568ae10a.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="180" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/DSC_0265_zps568ae10a.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Any closer, peasant, and you shall regret not wearing eye protection.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
Pie now appears to be sole custodian of the sofa, only having to fight Meleri for sitting rights. He usually wins by emitting gross smells, and shedding on her.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/DSC_0233_zps83c55a18.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="180" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/DSC_0233_zps83c55a18.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Mine! Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahahahahahahahaha. *parp*</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
Lord Mystery has claimed bedonia for himself and is now official inwpector of duvets, to add to his already impressive resume. He seems happy in his work.<br />
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Mim had a massive dignity fail earlier in the week. She came dashing in from the garden and started scooching her bum on the carpet, like a dog does. This caused much mirth, but i thought I had better investigate, as she was now gnawing at her imperial nether regions. I bravely cornered her, and turned her upside down, to be confronted with a pooey human hair dangling forth. I got some tissue and removed said offending hair, and was hissed at and bitten for my efforts. She the retreated to her new realm, and paffed my foot and growled at me, every time that I walked past, for about an hour, to restore her damaged pride.<br />
I should have taken pictures and sold them to a French magazine.creadurhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13296763039067248323noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5329061031270157736.post-4059470766706897752012-09-06T22:10:00.001+00:002012-09-06T22:10:53.378+00:00Architect cats architects! Pie infests new realms.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjO6BhNQu7ElBVAIboJQKDUjfpEcGo4R7U2aS49YnOYHFYzD57fPJkALyvpAz4bC74ad7Fo9mbSfKrdopY1BrZm6fwSAD_DChQoZUPZu1hiFvMdOtDteLGBurxwSeMnJrtinRJkCOutgRs/s1600/IMG_1368.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><br /></a></div>
So.... a month has gone by. A busy busy month, some good, some bad. The girls had a great holiday, and My daughter has decided to come back and study in the UK, so is now ensconced in the spare room, like a sort of gothy/emo hermit. We are trying to get her into college, but it is a slow slow process, and as you may or may not know, I am SUPER impatient. This is making for some frowny faces. In other news, I also had my "medical assesment" from ATOS<sers>, the people sent by the government to round up the mentally ill, disabled, and handicapped, and make them all be not mentally ill, handicapped, or disabled, by taking their benefits away. Guess what? Yup. they stopped mine. Being mentally ill <depression that would make a Morrisey fan look happy>, having a ruined back <seriously, I make a sound like a transformer when I sit/stand>, ruined eye sight < to the point where I walked into my own kitchen wall three times today, I only have one eye. The other one isn't happy either>, is apparently not enough. A big fat 0 points. So I, and my component parts, are appealing the descision.<br />
This did lead to a massive mental wobble, and me posting something on facebook, and not even remembering I did it. I'm sorry to anyone who got upset, but I love you all. I am just a bit messed up in the neurochemistry department at the moment. More pills, more blood tests.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhFIFbBzos6NHlzshvSJXtYIojVanqfiap8iO_1ZMaVA31lpcJ0gE943LI6H-ST7zcGxnZfERaishQ6E-sKULVJmRVBeoJ6CknjUAM9mXWXauLa5_wsmqyVw_PTpD44ey-qJDSUdCuvuwA/s1600/atos-healthcare+copy.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="201" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhFIFbBzos6NHlzshvSJXtYIojVanqfiap8iO_1ZMaVA31lpcJ0gE943LI6H-ST7zcGxnZfERaishQ6E-sKULVJmRVBeoJ6CknjUAM9mXWXauLa5_wsmqyVw_PTpD44ey-qJDSUdCuvuwA/s320/atos-healthcare+copy.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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In happy news, the workshop has been completed, supervised by Mystery who sat around watching various labours, and offering useful tips. Mim is in charge of interior decor.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgnQZJKHA2nqHbNDiJuD8GyN7BCGgVrSvLAVkp8zklEVcKqPhwRdz_gDGO4OQeca-JuVRUVPlxfxOWHhIHwHIXC7aQcZ6ZCHCKXxJjaswhCDuy9d5bP5gdw9U2h3wO4vEtIBd5uoatMOTg/s1600/IMG_1365.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgnQZJKHA2nqHbNDiJuD8GyN7BCGgVrSvLAVkp8zklEVcKqPhwRdz_gDGO4OQeca-JuVRUVPlxfxOWHhIHwHIXC7aQcZ6ZCHCKXxJjaswhCDuy9d5bP5gdw9U2h3wO4vEtIBd5uoatMOTg/s320/IMG_1365.JPG" width="213" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Highly shedlike </td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjO6BhNQu7ElBVAIboJQKDUjfpEcGo4R7U2aS49YnOYHFYzD57fPJkALyvpAz4bC74ad7Fo9mbSfKrdopY1BrZm6fwSAD_DChQoZUPZu1hiFvMdOtDteLGBurxwSeMnJrtinRJkCOutgRs/s1600/IMG_1368.JPG" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"> </a></td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"> </td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"> </td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"> </td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"> </td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"> </td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"> </td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"> </td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"> </td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"> </td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"> </td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"> </td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"> </td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"> </td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"> </td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"> </td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"> </td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br /></td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br /></td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br /></td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br /></td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br /></td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br /></td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br /></td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br /></td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br /></td></tr>
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It looked like this... pre mimming.<br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjO6BhNQu7ElBVAIboJQKDUjfpEcGo4R7U2aS49YnOYHFYzD57fPJkALyvpAz4bC74ad7Fo9mbSfKrdopY1BrZm6fwSAD_DChQoZUPZu1hiFvMdOtDteLGBurxwSeMnJrtinRJkCOutgRs/s1600/IMG_1368.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjO6BhNQu7ElBVAIboJQKDUjfpEcGo4R7U2aS49YnOYHFYzD57fPJkALyvpAz4bC74ad7Fo9mbSfKrdopY1BrZm6fwSAD_DChQoZUPZu1hiFvMdOtDteLGBurxwSeMnJrtinRJkCOutgRs/s320/IMG_1368.JPG" width="213" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Wood, giant tapeworm, and discarded instructions.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
After a little tutting, wandering about, sniffing, and telling mystery how to paint, mim came up with this colour scheme.<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-TYOi6tATZMLf3ztuz2hSLNUElur_pHqujvM_6PkPtJrD0xrFZPB-28KoErS6mEfPo4c8SpqIo9lduCS83KXPqCwzk31F243YECquc572RFRDv7zvIePwe3Ae7-9gaE2lOXORj49BEeg/s1600/IMG_1393.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-TYOi6tATZMLf3ztuz2hSLNUElur_pHqujvM_6PkPtJrD0xrFZPB-28KoErS6mEfPo4c8SpqIo9lduCS83KXPqCwzk31F243YECquc572RFRDv7zvIePwe3Ae7-9gaE2lOXORj49BEeg/s320/IMG_1393.JPG" width="213" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Mim surveys her jaunty work, Mystery wonders why he is nailed to the top.</td></tr>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhEaez4fNEqf8xJ4Q2biVJh0B90gnWJm30Et523P4YgQSDLhVMxhRkVacZdxqYLdoA6ly8zgxbQtvwGr_3feKpLijqwIIJ1dClzS6pm2DMnNJd9SeKKtU7TWSBUdaOz494_dLtFFF2di9k/s1600/IMG_1395.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhEaez4fNEqf8xJ4Q2biVJh0B90gnWJm30Et523P4YgQSDLhVMxhRkVacZdxqYLdoA6ly8zgxbQtvwGr_3feKpLijqwIIJ1dClzS6pm2DMnNJd9SeKKtU7TWSBUdaOz494_dLtFFF2di9k/s320/IMG_1395.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">bright jaunty interior, just right for leaving mouse faces in</td></tr>
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<br />She did a damned fine job, and I'm sure that The boys jaws will stop aching from all the paintbrush holding, soon.<br />
Pie has been working so hard, all he has been able to do is flop into bed at night. He has, on account of his skinny nature, been sat on a few times by humans. This bothers him not.<br />
He just lays there, hogging the bed, farting, snoring , and dribbling. Its like having an extra me sleeping there.<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/DSC_0251.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="180" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/DSC_0251.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">NO NOOOOOO! Just five more minutes!</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
Mim has, when not decorating, been chasing about waving her tail madly, and hissing at stuff, mainly Pie, and me. I'm not sure what she is up to, but I bet it is evil. It probably involves dead things.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/IMG_0202-1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="213" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/IMG_0202-1.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">If I glue this to a mouse, It will be good, oh yes, oh yes.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
Mystery has become an almost permanent fixture on the roof of the shed. I'm not sure if he is on guard, waiting to hit me on the head as I enter, or if the pesky sun has squashed him again.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjGMcWxPvpH33vcue1W5WZbxmOgBC55r8B_QDf9AgqPjOvQSVvmNYaZAVn7eoE1MZXky_B89ofMKFDYJdnFn6ZtdD22N8L6OG1Ml0ooAMGjErBGtQ_daGm1oNwUIf7dRcvvSa_TtFJnSz8/s1600/IMG_1394.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjGMcWxPvpH33vcue1W5WZbxmOgBC55r8B_QDf9AgqPjOvQSVvmNYaZAVn7eoE1MZXky_B89ofMKFDYJdnFn6ZtdD22N8L6OG1Ml0ooAMGjErBGtQ_daGm1oNwUIf7dRcvvSa_TtFJnSz8/s320/IMG_1394.JPG" width="213" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">None shall pass. Unless they have ham, of course.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
More updateyness soon, and I'm again sorry its been so long.<br />
<br />creadurhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13296763039067248323noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5329061031270157736.post-72382393295718115282012-08-11T22:04:00.001+00:002012-08-11T22:04:06.709+00:00Olympic cat goes for gold. Mim goes for throat.<br />
My daughter Meleri is also over visiting with her best friend, So Ruth and I have been totally teenagered. This appears to include a lot of shrugging in response to questions, odd girly perfumey smells, loud internet usage, and singing. <br />
Thurday saw Ruth and I celebrate our wedding anniversay <our 4th, and as its flowers and fruit, we went for a picnic with the girls, atop Bangor mountain, which was sunny, still, and lovely. There were lots of flowers about, and we had some delicious fruit, as well as other tasty victuals. Good times , good times. My wife is excellent, and makes me very proud and happy.<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi1VzINC9hTgwxmBB91HFbzFkl1rNCNbb2W5Q8LpUn6LnWDd2f5bA2r-U7YAg_3tA_8PJ5GvAHIJgLrCfBKgKjAAVMhyp4ls9K_1nv-6H-7_4sshsT2z0PEiMs6cLsBC-mYH9ALjA9wY2c/s1600/IMG_0466.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi1VzINC9hTgwxmBB91HFbzFkl1rNCNbb2W5Q8LpUn6LnWDd2f5bA2r-U7YAg_3tA_8PJ5GvAHIJgLrCfBKgKjAAVMhyp4ls9K_1nv-6H-7_4sshsT2z0PEiMs6cLsBC-mYH9ALjA9wY2c/s320/IMG_0466.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Keri, Meleri, and Ruth.</td></tr>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhKyre23oqh1lfwc-zCWAB7WRus3xzenV3VvbFv2mv_fQxclIenTQUow4MumoVRq9KYsnGPqjhYFR3iJf0LF-f3BCFAm7euqRshue9X5nhNywaAChuUJKrzYp0VafqGhB-aFoEBgmf48ik/s1600/your+anniv.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="287" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhKyre23oqh1lfwc-zCWAB7WRus3xzenV3VvbFv2mv_fQxclIenTQUow4MumoVRq9KYsnGPqjhYFR3iJf0LF-f3BCFAm7euqRshue9X5nhNywaAChuUJKrzYp0VafqGhB-aFoEBgmf48ik/s320/your+anniv.png" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The card design I made for Ruth.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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In a tribute to the worlds olympians, Mr Pie has taken to wearing a laurel crown on his rounds in the garden, and loudly proclaiming his might, just before the sun squashes him. He has so far won gold in the "dirtiest belly" and "most irritating meow" events, and earned a silver in the "eating another animals vomit" category.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiHgqPD6vAfopM2xfQxxrvOvTQ2ZVZK3llWuffygUnaw36ltmMiGWaT0am25ZkyA6DoU5gWbNUmdFSnAoRtbvNhdAjUwhtaBPFElPBnOCINkTCidGFneIoK-WU572Z3_okiP_xsAmEgc4Y/s1600/prettyfloralbonnet.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="311" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiHgqPD6vAfopM2xfQxxrvOvTQ2ZVZK3llWuffygUnaw36ltmMiGWaT0am25ZkyA6DoU5gWbNUmdFSnAoRtbvNhdAjUwhtaBPFElPBnOCINkTCidGFneIoK-WU572Z3_okiP_xsAmEgc4Y/s320/prettyfloralbonnet.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The Bradley Wiggins of cats. Cos he's ginger.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrn7V7fuR3cpCqyW9WmA8SrceMuLUruBu6GeiyZa7owwigQZ_qSvBevSibx5oGIIK4qYtCoLV2pqB2wk_ZD_7A6uDUMWhU3G_SYuxokiIvwaF11ljX6Ny71LFXoaBQ4LOHnbWWcjkox5M/s1600/IMG_0440.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrn7V7fuR3cpCqyW9WmA8SrceMuLUruBu6GeiyZa7owwigQZ_qSvBevSibx5oGIIK4qYtCoLV2pqB2wk_ZD_7A6uDUMWhU3G_SYuxokiIvwaF11ljX6Ny71LFXoaBQ4LOHnbWWcjkox5M/s320/IMG_0440.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Dirty belly, enhanced by sticky buds and hair clumps. 10 10 10 9.5.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
Mystery has a gold in "lounging" and "hunting rug mice", a silver in "mooching cheese from humans", and a bronze in "sitting by the food bowl silently making you feel guilty, even though you have just fed him" We are expecting great things from him in "longest cat", "scariest fang action", "power pooping" and "doubles tennis".<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgSnVS4-Ofc4HXi4SDaUSHMcVaGYn7n1rtzNTS8-YeLMILaRQ_0I-SzfqelNGNlh7k_z5Pwz_SfZ-z88KA6N9KMr-MD9ONYd7Chcw_LuFBrpgaMU0iKzeFez2KFmUxDwgNtC5VFV-m59jU/s1600/Photo0130+-+Copy+%282%29.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgSnVS4-Ofc4HXi4SDaUSHMcVaGYn7n1rtzNTS8-YeLMILaRQ_0I-SzfqelNGNlh7k_z5Pwz_SfZ-z88KA6N9KMr-MD9ONYd7Chcw_LuFBrpgaMU0iKzeFez2KFmUxDwgNtC5VFV-m59jU/s320/Photo0130+-+Copy+%282%29.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Training for "longest cat"</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhdL-5iBTAg-ddRbL5YyeV3MbFs-wt_gX64e38tJpKtChy0zxx10mRh21WDvk5uqJ7PucUIU_Ko-XLBlELgtxDYrwjuGKzAYuSorQ_cbQABzXtYrQHszqpyof3EllIyWinpuj5BM0nQoVE/s1600/Photo0158.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhdL-5iBTAg-ddRbL5YyeV3MbFs-wt_gX64e38tJpKtChy0zxx10mRh21WDvk5uqJ7PucUIU_Ko-XLBlELgtxDYrwjuGKzAYuSorQ_cbQABzXtYrQHszqpyof3EllIyWinpuj5BM0nQoVE/s320/Photo0158.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Power pooping qualifying round.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
Mim won the "wrestling a human finger" contest on a technicality, as one of the Korean cats didn't put in enough effort. She got gold in the "extreme licking" and "making a sound like a drill going through steel, when you are turned upside down, but secretly enjoying it" event. Tomorrow sees " shouting through a closed window to be let in, when you really don't want to be let in", and the eagerly anticipated defence of her "mouse gouging" title. She is also hoping for a place in the finals of "pretending to play, then goring your human"<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhjYJlGTAqyDrOSQJzAjNh7afp8rBsLU2SfZ3N-YQ61IyGpRcOuW2vLo8hG3CHKxr4Glx7nHUjf1nLhmKeVoe7WqsiQWS9gbqHNbNAp6_3W95p-vBcJ6GZudSnauQRzeHUIfuNlkTI56FA/s1600/owned.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhjYJlGTAqyDrOSQJzAjNh7afp8rBsLU2SfZ3N-YQ61IyGpRcOuW2vLo8hG3CHKxr4Glx7nHUjf1nLhmKeVoe7WqsiQWS9gbqHNbNAp6_3W95p-vBcJ6GZudSnauQRzeHUIfuNlkTI56FA/s320/owned.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">About to deploy the "extended painful claw" defense.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgjjJfqrnQlYhFMw69WqkoFgmoppNRJEYltmU4yYpdyb29cglhdh2TYwC0kfkH4W59Ql15CRXbj7CGA_HdzSGVUg_RW9LgxRpniQUf1HY2GizWsI22uiW2QUoSBTttPtjaKuEkxoBpOtGM/s1600/IMG_0005.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgjjJfqrnQlYhFMw69WqkoFgmoppNRJEYltmU4yYpdyb29cglhdh2TYwC0kfkH4W59Ql15CRXbj7CGA_HdzSGVUg_RW9LgxRpniQUf1HY2GizWsI22uiW2QUoSBTttPtjaKuEkxoBpOtGM/s320/IMG_0005.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Athletic concentration</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg0BkOqeIHmoUwpzehKAnGK5DF58qALA3Cpaagu9J8lHYnsEAYJrBtPLqdgu4kILdyVOGfBnny07saVYfmWpB0A1YyKi5YYRzRg4yaDnumvnHSzQzU4RW0D-nasDpNyONNhG5jFcHJ7gA0/s1600/IMG_0232.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg0BkOqeIHmoUwpzehKAnGK5DF58qALA3Cpaagu9J8lHYnsEAYJrBtPLqdgu4kILdyVOGfBnny07saVYfmWpB0A1YyKi5YYRzRg4yaDnumvnHSzQzU4RW0D-nasDpNyONNhG5jFcHJ7gA0/s320/IMG_0232.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">stretching is important.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
More soon! Workshop arrives monday, so that will be interesting :Dcreadurhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13296763039067248323noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5329061031270157736.post-61981558220409394542012-07-29T19:27:00.001+00:002012-07-29T19:27:30.820+00:00Gathering source material. Stackable closeup cats abound!The camera has been acquired! Now I roam around the countryside shooting things. It's a bit like being the king of Spain, without all the hassle of going and troubling the elephants of Botswana. No no fair reader, I shoot them <i>using only the power of light. </i>Yeah, that's right, I have a telephoto lens. I need my own pics for painting source material, and the camera < A canon dslr EOS 1100D> is the ideal way to do it. Thank you government. The rest of the business start up gubbinz is being ordered tomorrow.<br />
Ruth and I went out for a meander today, and with her spotting butterflies for me <She is MUCH better at it than me>, I got some nice shots.<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/meadowbrown.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="213" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/meadowbrown.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">A meadow brown.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/redadmiral-1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="213" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/redadmiral-1.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">A red admiral</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
I also trod in some cow poop, cut my elbow, got stung by nettles, cut my shin on some brambles, and nearly threw up at the smell of the place a sheep had recently met its end. I'm a low budget Ray Mears! Ruth carried on, serene as a cloud, spotting butterflies and looking lovely with her new scarf that she knitted, and I took photos of, for her "Ravelry". Something to do with knitting and its arcane arts.<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/IMG_0306.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="213" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/IMG_0306.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">It's called "cats paw" pattern. *nods knowledgeably* </td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
<br />
We were also watched by some small cows, who were clearly waiting for our backs to turn, so they could eat us.<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/IMG_0369.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="213" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/IMG_0369.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">cow monster watches you fall into nettles.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
Of course, the best way to get to know a new camera, as we all know, is to take a LOT of pictures of cats. We have a lot of cats, so this is a happy coincidence. Mystery is normally hard to take pics of, as he is black, and all you see is black cat shape, and yellow menacing eyes, but i have persevered, and with the aid of Ruth waving a stick in the air, managed to get some good ones of him. He is not camera shy in the slightest, in fact we had to stop him from going and getting a feather boa to pose with, the shameless thing. He showed his displeasure, by shouting loudly for his agent. He was there for some time.<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/IMG_0257.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="213" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/IMG_0257.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Paint me like one of your french girls.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/IMG_0258.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="213" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/IMG_0258.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The ennui of modern youth.</td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br /></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/IMG_0260.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="213" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/IMG_0260.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The Nosferatu remake was going well</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/IMG_0239.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="213" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/IMG_0239.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I want to renegotiate my contract. Or kill you in the face!</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
Mim has taken to loudly peeping, and running off whirling her tail insanely, if she thinks I'm about to take a picture, So I have become cunning and sneaky. She caught a mouse the other night, and was feigning disinterest in it until Pie showed up. Then there was a sort of stand off, as Pie slunk about being fat, orange, and moochy, whilst Mim behaved like a minute air raid siren, and growled, whilst shouting "YUM YUM YUM" to indicate that the mouse was firmly hers.<br />
Pie "You have a mouse my queen! A most handsome catch"<br />
Mim "Miiiiine all miiiine" * cackles insanely*<br />
Pie " you do realise that I shall try and steal it, as soon as you blink, right?"<br />
Mim "I will punch you so hard your whiskers will go into orbit" * picks up mouse*<br />
Mouse "Hey! I'm still alive"<br />
Mim "That's why I'm going to start with your feet"<br />
<br />
*screams and crunching*<br />
<br />
"Pie looks away, appalled*<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/mimmousehunter3.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="213" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/mimmousehunter3.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Oh crap, oh crap oh crap.</td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br /></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/mimmousehunter1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="213" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/mimmousehunter1.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Curses, foiled again.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
Cat photography is fun.<br />
<br />creadurhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13296763039067248323noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5329061031270157736.post-19765025930142818722012-07-20T20:27:00.001+00:002012-07-20T21:38:28.295+00:00Bet you thought I'd fallen into the brush water.Well well well, so..... it would transpire that I'm still alive. I've been kind of caught up in the business planning and government wrangling stage of set up, which although tooth grindingly slow, fiddly, and mired in red tape, must be done. I have had help from Aled, one of our local business advisors, and the ever patient and cheery Joyce from want to work, in my corner, so that's been of great help. Sadly I've been to frazzled to actually paint anything. I'm getting my painty mojo back on though, and am going to paint a bunch of small mammals, mainly because they are fun, and cute, and people like pictures of fun cute things , with less than six legs.<br />
I'm EVEN getting a workshop to work in, and am making sure there is no internetz attached to it, to resist temptation NOT to work, but do other things, like,......blog.....or play games on the net.<br />
I've also been using the rather cool camera on my phone to take pictures of "natures tiny things" I find these more fascinating than natures big things, and as we don't get many bison in our garden, I can't take pics of big things. This will be remedied when I get a SLR in a few weeks time. Macro telephoto lenses will enable me to paparazzi all manner of small creature, and big ones too. Examples:<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/woodlouse.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="230" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/woodlouse.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Oh, Look...one of Jedward. NO WAIT ITS A WOODLOUSE! Mr WOODLOUSE! Mr WOODLOUSE! LOOK THIS WAY!</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/DSC_0225.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="180" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/DSC_0225.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">An aquilegia leaf and a drop of water. OR the hulk about to mash a diamond.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
The cats have been curled up due to water expansion . They did try a dance routine, but Pie got a bit to jazz handy, and punched Mystery in the face. It all got a bit "black swan" when Mim turned up.<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/DSC_0232-1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="277" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/DSC_0232-1.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I regret NOTHING.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
<br />
Mystery "Left rear paw, left rear paw, shake front paws"<br />
Pie flails around.<br />
Mystery "amateur"<br />
Mim scuttles in and beats them both up for waking her.<br />
<br />
More at the weekend, with luck.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />creadurhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13296763039067248323noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5329061031270157736.post-91698587671489692312012-06-13T23:22:00.000+00:002012-06-13T23:22:12.603+00:00H2O the enemy of fur.Well well well. It has been a while. I have finished the business start up course, getting business model sorted, and waiting for my nice "fixer" to get back from holiday.<br />
My brother Stewart got married to his long suffering finacee, Claire. It was a lovely wedding, made all the better by my daughter Meleri being there. I managed to scandalise her. I am oficially one of those dads who is totally embarrassing. I consider this a great achievement.also<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/family.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/family.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The fambily Erridge. Like the Waltons, but much tougher.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
Whilst we were "daaaaan saaaaaaf" <down south, for those of you from north of london>, we went to see Steve, Pip, and Caleb - Human servants of Jones and Loki- at their new house <which is lovely>, and visited the cat servants of Jackie cat - Amy and Alan. They have moved down from Bangor recently, and we had to check that their master was looking after their needs. Enclosed is Jackies profile.<br />
<b>Jackie - cat</b><br />
A.K.A Toebeard<b><br /></b><br />
<b>Appearance: </b>A most regal and majestic blue eyed fluff creature, with luxurious toe beardage, and a beautiful creamy coat, like silk. mother was a cat, father was possibly a dandelion clock, or tribble. His tail is like an ornamental grass. His face is long elegant, and a bit daft.<br />
<b>Demeanor: </b>Cautious and squeaky, until sure of his dominance over humans, by dint of awesome fluffiness. Then he will play, lower himself to accept offerings, and bite wiggled fingers.<br />
<b>Territory: </b>The kingdom of Jackania. Enter at your risk.<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/DSC_0148.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="180" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/DSC_0148.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">You may approach. Stop, that is close enough.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
<br />
<br />
The wet weather has had an effect on the cats. War is sort of suspended......sort of. They have been sleeping on the bed, as the wet weather seems to make them curl up. Cat scientists maintain that this is due to cats back fur absorbing the rain and expanding faster than their belly fur. The difference in expansion causes them to curl into balls. Then they have no recourse but to sleep.<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Mim...forced to sniff her own bum, all due to rain.</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Mystery, sadly getting acquainted with his feet</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Pie, reduced to an orange ball of snooze.</td></tr>
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In the intervening times between downpours, they have been sun-squashed mightily, dashing only to the window sill when it starts to pour down, and their bodies start to curl.<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">For the love of the gods, let me in, human slave.</td></tr>
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There has been some paffage, and the chasing of grass stalks whilst rolling around. Mim and Pie have even been nose to nose and peeping at each other.. Using cat interpretation skills I deciphered one of their conversations.<br />
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<strong>Pie</strong> "Queen Mim, are you afflicted of rain curl?"<br />
<strong>Mim</strong> " Quiet varlet! If the humans hear us they will come and wuzz my belly> this will displease me....outwardly"<br />
<strong>Pie</strong> "Sir Mystery is asleep upon the quilt plain, we should maybe go and keep an eye on him, unless he takes over"<br />
<strong>Mim</strong> "I shall give you ten seconds, then I am going to punch you in the face"<br />
<strong>Pie</strong> "but...but"<br />
<strong>Mim</strong> *paff*<br />
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More soon.creadurhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13296763039067248323noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5329061031270157736.post-19585350725773560032012-05-25T20:36:00.001+00:002012-05-25T20:38:08.877+00:00The sun squashes all cats!This news, I know, is shocking, but I can think of no other explanation for the odd behaviour that the cats have been exhibiting the past few days. I first noticed this strange gravitic anomaly at the beginning of the week, when I noticed Princess Trousers laying very still on a window sill.<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Splat.</td></tr>
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She showed no signs of being able to move, even when I poked her in the ribs with my nose. all she could manage was to open one baleful eye, full of the promise of death.<br />
Curious, but not unheard of behaviour from her.<br />
Later that same day, I found Mystery, crammed into a discarded BBQ tray. Some unspeakable act of war, perpetrated by one of the others, or was he walking over it when struck with something heavy.....LIKE THE SUN!<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Ker-splot!</td></tr>
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Pie was nowhere to be seen, until it got dark. He then proceeded to try and get as far away from the ground as he could, with a misguided idea that the further away from the ground he was, the longer the squashing sun would take to smoosh him flat. This seemed to involve climbing up me and going to sleep on my shoulder.<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Fuzz parrot.</td></tr>
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Later he practiced his "I am squished flatter than a surrendering bug" pose.<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Superman! I am it!</td></tr>
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The sun has sent them a bit odd, and also rather floppy. Top cat scientists have worked out that when the sun comes out, it forces extra gravity out with the heat, and cats are susceptible to the changes in gravity < as anyone who has seen a cat jump, only to pause, matrix style, and wiffle through the air will know> Its the reason lions lay down a lot. What makes this even more amazing is that cats cannot use calculators, so they must have done it all with slide rules.<br />
Mim tried to avoid the weight of the sun by making a nest in a bush, which seems to have partly worked, as she had enough freedom of movement to sniff at some branches, which were relevant to her interests.<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Queen of pain one, sun nil.</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Twig inhalation. A rarely seen cat hobby.</td></tr>
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Sadly the boy was caught out, and received the full weight of the solar orb. Struggle as he may, he was unable to break free of its terrible bonds, apart from the brief moment when the sun wasn't loking, and he made it to the shade of the shed.<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Sun one, Mystery nil.</td></tr>
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Today was much the same all round. except the cats found new places to get subjugated by our stellar neighbor.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/DSC_0079.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="180" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/DSC_0079.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The sun, it's just a big glowing bully.</td></tr>
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They seem disinclined to do much to each other at the moment.<br />
Other cat observers around the UK have apparently seen the same behaviour, with their furry friends being found upside down on kitchen floors, or slumped sideways on carpets. The sun must be stopped!<br />
<br />creadurhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13296763039067248323noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5329061031270157736.post-23842070486887773442012-05-19T19:16:00.002+00:002012-05-19T19:16:25.478+00:00Painting a hare, step by step. Mim messily eats rodents.As this blog was meant to actually be about painting, but has been Hijacked by hairy fiends, I thought I'd redress the balance. I know this will come as a disappointment to most, as cats are clearly the priority, but more of them later.<br />
In major news, I have been fast tracked onto the business start up scheme! I start the short course and getting a business plan done, starting monday. It's all happened very fast, and I am both excited and pant poopingly frightened.<br />
For now though......... A hare, in pieces. Not hit-by-a-land-mine pieces, but in thin non bacon slices.<br />
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First of all, you have to sketch the beasty, using a photo or digital image as reference material <unless you have an eidetic mind, which lets face it, I don't> For this picture I used a composite of digital images. You can use a "wire frame" style of initial geometric shapes if you feel the need, but I like hares and am familiar with them <but not in a witchy way,> so i could block all the elements together without much fuss.<br />
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Next I tend to block in major colour elements of the painting. In this case the legs, haunches, and some of the fur are a lighter tone, or different texture from the rougher back fur so I highlighted them with a wash. I then made some coffee, and played Battlestar Galactica online for a while, and stretched my back<br />
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Coffee break over I made a darker wash for the other fur areas, applied it and then blended with a water pen and left to dry. This enabled me to make dinner.<br />
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Dinner having been eaten, and more coffee <working juice>, I moved on to adding some of the darker tones to the piece, and blending them with the water pen whilst listening to Nightwish. The opeatic metal isn't a necessity, but I like it.Using the water pen means you can push the paint around a fair bit, and remove mistakes.<br />
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Stopping to go for a pee, and then losing my favourite brush <it was in my hair - the brush, not my pee>, I carried on, adding the grey tones to the ears and haunches, and starting to put in details, like claws, leg tendonns and a scary demonic orange blob for an eye. More swearing, sore back, Add coffee and pain killers.<br />
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Next I finished the eye, using paint neat from the tube, as the more concentrated pigments I find easier to do tiny details with and they are brighter, I also added definition and shading to the ears, limbs, tail, and back.<br />
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Heres a close up of the face. I also added an yellow ring around the pupil, to try and capture the hares inherent "screw you" attitude. If you have ever seen a live one close up, you will know what I mean. Add more coffee, watch Mim noisily devour a mouse.<br />
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Finally, having touched up some more shading, I used a watercolour pencil to add the whiskers, and a medium/thin wash, with a fan brush, to apply the fur detail.<br />
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So there you have it. One brown hare, running like the Queen of pain herself was after it.<br />
Speaking of which, her is her ladyship messily nomming a mouse that was stupid enough to exist.<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Om nom no...oi oi oi oi!</td></tr>
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<br />creadurhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13296763039067248323noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5329061031270157736.post-14753411992678750142012-05-11T20:12:00.001+00:002012-05-11T20:12:28.810+00:00face/paw action! Sentry cat watches.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/c753295f-5c52-4c8e-8482-8e223539d3b7.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="239" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/c753295f-5c52-4c8e-8482-8e223539d3b7.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Peaceful coalition? Truce? Or hoping the queen of pain doesn't spot them?</td></tr>
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Well folks, the war has resumed, after several weeks of truce <the truce may have been due to the unseasonal rain, as cats can't fight in scuba gear>. Today was sunny! And as a result the feline megalomaniacs have been out trying to own each other. Well, by "feline megalomaniacs" I actually just mean Mim. Her trick today, I observed whilst getting the mud off of my tent in the garden. She sits on the roof, like queen of the world, or possibly a scarily large Meer cat, and when opportunity presents its self , she dashes down and paffs her foe into insensitivity.<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Boldly she watches for her prey.</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/DSC_0033-1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="180" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/DSC_0033-1.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">.....The she gets a target lock</td></tr>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Then she ends you.</td></tr>
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Do not be fooled by the fluffy picture of perfect pinky toeness! she can deliver a paff to another cat that sends them boss eyed with angst and pain, and can make a cute slapping noise on a human. Pray she does not employ her razor claws.<br />
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Mystery seems to be less than totally impressed by the antics of the fluff tailed ninja, and spent most of the day asleep on our neighbours roof. He was out of the way enough to avoid a direct assault, and was still enough that the flat eyed dervish probably thought he was a rock or some such. I personally think he is biding his time, and waiting for Mim to slip up, as she will no doubt do one day. Then he will mess her up.<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">A picture of sun and patient retribution</td></tr>
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Poor old Pie decided to run out of the back door and met mim coming the other way, this resulted in a paff war of truly epic proportions. I watched and sang the star trek fight music, as both cats sat on their back legs and did jazz hands at each other, teeny white paws flailing, whiskers getting bent, and face fur rumpled. Truly it was a sight to behold. Mim ran off into the underbrush, whilst Poor old pie limped into the house and put on his tin foil battle helmet, before breaking wind, and falling asleep on the sofa.<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">send my mothership nao!</td></tr>
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No more bits of wildlife have been slaughtered in the past couple of days, so I am guessing Mim has finished her prayers to her dark gods, and they have blessed her spring offensive. You have been warned.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/cathulhuu.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="248" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/cathulhuu.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Didn't we have a lovely time, the day we met cathulhu?</td></tr>
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<br />creadurhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13296763039067248323noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5329061031270157736.post-66088639566840043612012-05-09T21:10:00.000+00:002012-05-10T00:31:39.849+00:00Updated, belated, and a kitty gyrated.I am back! I have had a busy spurt, combined with my natural forgetfulness, and being coated in mud and then deep frozen at a Live Roleplay event.... well thats my excuses and I stand by them.<br />
I have picked up a job from a well known zoological establishment for some art, but I'm not sure if I'm allowed to mention the establishment at the moment, until its all signed off. But it IS good to know people like my work. Likewise, I may have some stocked in small tourist shop soon. I'm going to send query/abusive/ downright threatening emails to some galleries and arty shops too. Especially the more flammable ones. <Kidding, I'd never burn a shop down... but Mim might><br />
The thing with the government is going well too. I'm going for some training in the art of running a business, and then I can start on the <quite frankly pant piddlingly scary> road to self employment and financial terror.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiFYhAJTvMhGYmtMfFNff0Uxa28tq2484R81igJK6BhCmYeVfEWu1uQJzv4BWNNRjJoFN78YtQ6N4KdM16SCjvqa4b99hMvcveDvGaafoQwbJdgcAGg05iMywAcsud2_uG58A9qvQ-MYb4/s1600/hesabignob.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="199" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiFYhAJTvMhGYmtMfFNff0Uxa28tq2484R81igJK6BhCmYeVfEWu1uQJzv4BWNNRjJoFN78YtQ6N4KdM16SCjvqa4b99hMvcveDvGaafoQwbJdgcAGg05iMywAcsud2_uG58A9qvQ-MYb4/s320/hesabignob.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I may be a colossal arse, but i can't help but like his bird pictures.</td></tr>
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<br />
News in the world of cats:<br />
Mystery has decided to gnaw his own bum off, and I'm not sure why. I think it may have something to do with Mims crimes against birds <more later>, and as a reformed bird murderer he is doing some sort of Buddhist priest type protest. Luckily he has no thumbs, so he hasn't set fire to himself. It's either that, or he had a flea allergy. Either way it looks very sore at the moment.<br />
He went to sleep on my head the other night, as I sat on the sofa . Pie was on my lap, snoring and smelling awful, and the boy <wisely> decided that my head was a safer sleeping spot than the spare cushion, where he might get breathed on. He is odd. I believe Ruth took a pic of him getting into position. I shall find it and add it. <br />
After a brief soujourn as "other peoples cat", Tiger has a new collar that tells people not to feed him, as the hairy chancer will eat the neighbors out of house and home. He is still shouting like a mad tramp with pants on his head, first thing in the morning. But ONLY AT ME! He just looks at ruth with thin eyes, and giver her the poor paw routine.<br />
Speaking of tiger, Here is a picture I took the other day, as I lay in bed. This is what I see first thing in the morning.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/DSC_0021.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="180" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/DSC_0021.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">food time now plz? Or I fart again, oh and i was in the bin whilst you slept. Good morning.</td></tr>
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That look? That is the thin eye. He has also taken to sleeping on my hand, a bit like Mim, but with less finger chewing <see below><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/DSC_0028.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="180" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/DSC_0028.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">None shall leave, pillow human!</td></tr>
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<br />
<br />
Mim has been killing again. One slightly mouldy thrush type thing was discovered hidden under the dining table, like some stink grenade. She has also been killing Bluetits and messily eating them in front of her mother. When the killing has abated, and her terrible thirst for blood has been temporarily slaked, she has been zooming round the house with her tail rotating like a fluffy propellor. She is also odd.<br />
This evening she went to sleep sucking my thumb. It was both cute and highly disturbing, as when i tried to get my finger free <having my digits in a predators mouth doesn't appeal to me, especially a predator I have seen bite off a mouses face>, she stuck her claws into my hand and looked at me as if to say "move it, and you will regret it, sirrah"<br />
<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/DSC_0022.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="180" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/DSC_0022.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Camouflaged against any surface, predator cat bides her time.</td></tr>
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In revenge, I have been making her heeb and dance for cheese dreamies.<br />
I will add the pic of the boy as soon as I find it.creadurhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13296763039067248323noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5329061031270157736.post-23038050380901661582012-05-01T14:49:00.002+00:002012-05-01T14:49:59.840+00:00It's been a while. Hence this is long.I've not posted since the eighth of April! Very slack and I am most sorry. Many things have been happening, and mostly for the good. Firstly It was Ruths birthday, so we went to beaumaris for a bit of a stroll, and some light shopping, followed by the worlds most epic fudge coated birthday cake EVER. I made it all myself, and may have gone a bit over the top with the icing, as it was about an inch thick, and the cake was tall enough that it would have given a Tyranosaur gob strain, and so sweet, we could see through time by eating it.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5blbUuKskPgKNgvqsiuRWFchgX_bvJ6_SzPrBD37zWTpOc_2JTI34MDsBIFk04BH84SnYze2VJeM1GM8EgWBI0ggToVMOE4RMkc-zkBV748RXdLM_aGYvcK-7LT4LcqGmTCIDaZWcwxc/s1600/tyranocake+copy.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="203" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5blbUuKskPgKNgvqsiuRWFchgX_bvJ6_SzPrBD37zWTpOc_2JTI34MDsBIFk04BH84SnYze2VJeM1GM8EgWBI0ggToVMOE4RMkc-zkBV748RXdLM_aGYvcK-7LT4LcqGmTCIDaZWcwxc/s320/tyranocake+copy.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Better than Stegosaur.</td></tr>
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<br />
Also, The government seem to want me to be able to set up doing paining, and making things with pictures on them, for a living, which is great. So I'm working with an assembly funded scheme to egt things running... watch this space.<br />
<br />
We went down to See our friends Steve, Pip, and their son Caleb a week or so ago too. Always a pleasure to visit them, even if the journey down did take about seven hours instead of three, as the weather was awful, and people drove like they were holding the wheel with their mouthes, which is why they kept smashing into stuff. On saturday we went to the Marwell consevation park, where Steve is a teacher. I can see why he loves working there so much, the place is totally cool, and I advise you all to visit. They have posing porn lemurs.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/150737_10150994300944689_685239688_13065353_1641739322_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="180" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/150737_10150994300944689_685239688_13065353_1641739322_n.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">We love you long time.</td></tr>
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Inverted Amur Leopards, who just want a belly fuss, the teasing teasing ubermims.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/536297_10150994308689689_685239688_13065389_212675786_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="180" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/536297_10150994308689689_685239688_13065389_212675786_n.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">There is the ultimate paff war, waiting to happen.</td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br /></td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br /></td></tr>
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<br />
And Snow Leopards. Snow leopards are essentially dandelion clock that would rip your face off, if they could be bothered to get up and stop showing their delightful bellys.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/557845_10150994310129689_685239688_13065405_1127099499_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="180" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/557845_10150994310129689_685239688_13065405_1127099499_n.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Blow on my fluff, I dare you.</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/399053_10150994301104689_685239688_13065354_1194057711_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="180" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/399053_10150994301104689_685239688_13065354_1194057711_n.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">aw look, its aslee....ARGH MY FACE! MY BEAUTIFUL FACE!</td></tr>
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Much fun was had. There were loads of other beasties, some of which looked delicious, which would explain their endangered status. However, the big cats, and the penguins were the highlights for me. May I also add, hippos smell. Really really smell. Like unwashed tramps underwear on a hot summers day, when they have been storing cheddar in them to keep it safe from the mice.<br />
<br />
Steve and Pip have two cats. This pleases me. There is Loki, and Jones.<br />
<br />
<b>Loki.</b><br />
A.K.A Doofus, Mr Mo, MoMo, Moki.<br />
<b>Appearance</b><b> . </b>take a normal sized cat head, and stick it on the body of a four legged dump truck. He is a goliath, like a furry AT-AT. He has jet black shiny fur, yellow eyes, a proud nose and seems to be made from play dough. May have claws, but is not sure what they are for. Squeaks like a mouse.<br />
<b>Demeanour</b> Quite shy, but friendly once he is used to you, Likes to play fetch with balls of paper, quite a chatty soul too, if you like little meeping noises. Fights a lot with Jones, when he is not trying to hump her, or laying in the sun.<br />
<b>Territory</b> Anywhere the sun hits. * see below<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/DSC_0010.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="180" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/DSC_0010.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I have spotted the rebels shield generator.</td></tr>
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<b>Jones</b><br />
A.K.A Mrs B, Bones, The ginger freak, Boobs.<br />
<b>Appearance</b> Small, cute, snub nosed. Lovely silky soft marmalade fur, and pristine white trousers, Precious little white paws. More claws than a velociraptor. Doesn't purr but says "boof" to a lot of things. As yet undecided as to the meaning of "boof" Could be good, could mean death.<br />
<b>Demeanour</b> Snooty and timid, but can be fussed eventually, for about two seconds, then says "boof" and runs away. Savage ambush predator who bides her time after Loki's aborted humping attempts, the beats the living hell out of him. Entranced by cardboard tubes with paper sticking from them. Despises and yearns to eat all forms of life.<br />
<b>Territory</b> The bed, Calebs window sill. Chair backs, fish tanks, sunny spots < contested with Loki><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/DSC_0011.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="180" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/DSC_0011.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">"boof"</td></tr>
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These two have a complex relationship, one that is beyond the knowing of humans, Obvious only to other cats, and even then, I think they'd end up on Jeremy Kyle < cat edition><br />
<br />
<br />
Tommorow I shall tell you what our silly beasts have been up to. It involves tin foil hats, for a start.creadurhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13296763039067248323noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5329061031270157736.post-6595257073277110062012-04-08T20:55:00.001+00:002012-04-09T13:06:06.256+00:00A field guide to the cats.As I promised, herein lies some things to help with the identification of the triumvirate of evil that rules our house with a paw of iron. < A cat with iron paws would be awesome in a paff* fight > Also included is a glossary of terms used in the household, to describe the actions that are undertaken in the war for soft furnishing supremacy.<br />
<br />
<br />
<b>Madame Mim:</b><br />
A.K.A The queen of pain, Princess trousers*, Long toe, Mimlet, The Mimsicle, Ninja leg, Mimulator.<br />
<b>Appearance: </b>A small Calico cat, with one black front leg, precious little white paws <with unusually long toes>, a bandit mask, half and half coloured ears, and a tail like a toilet brush. She is has little white fangs, and more spikey clawed bits than is considered appropriate in polite society.<br />
<b>Demeanor: </b>Generally self possessed and moderately affectionate around humans. Suffers bouts of rage when turned upside down, and boops* noses as a show of displeasure. Around other cats, she feigns an attitude of indifference, until they get within striking range.<br />
<b>Territory: </b>Fairly much anywhere she wishes, as most of the local cats are scared witless of her. Prefers the bedroom, but will settle without notice on any surface, especially if said surface is needed for something.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/Mim.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="283" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/Mim.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Then BLAM! She eats your face.</td></tr>
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<b>Mystery:</b><br />
A.K.A The boy, Lord Heebington, Mystery T. Cat, The do, Mr nose for a nose, The heebus*, The plimper*<b><br /></b><br />
<b>Appearance: </b>Large, black, and shiny. He is a sleek mass of rippling muscle, with a saggy belly. Looks dignified, even though his pinky tongue sticks out quite often. Heavily scarred from a life of combat, putting his face into things he shouldn't and maybe even squirrel related wounds. Has fangs a sabre toothed cat would be proud of, and has kitchen devil blades for claws. Slightly greying around the ruff, and walks with a limp, a result of stopping a speeding car with his pelvis.<br />
<b>Demeanor: </b>Lovey and a bit skittish with humans. Keeps to himself, and is quite quiet around other cats, unless they get too close, or sniff him. Is prone to outbursts of mad running about chasing stuff, is a ferocious killer, and wanted by the court of mice for genocide. Catnip addict.<br />
<b>Territory: </b>The spare room, all boxes within the house, the bean bag, and any shopping bags or paper left on the floor.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/the%20cat/catty005.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/the%20cat/catty005.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The warrior in repose.</td></tr>
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<br />
<b>Tiger:</b><br />
A.K.A The belly, Pider, Mr Pie, The apricot nightmare, The orange horror, Fuzzbag, "that bloody cat", Old man, Fatty fat fat fat .<b><br /></b><br />
<b>Appearance: </b>The real life Bagpuss. Old, limps as his front right foot is a bit arthritic, is a mass of ginger and white teddy bear fur that sticks out in all directions <and randomly litters the floor with pielets*> has one squinchy* eye from a possibly Mystery inflicted battle wound. Is mostly made of ribs, and has a cannon ball for a belly. Sneezes in faces, farts a lot, and is followed by a slightly eggy smell. Does have fangs and claws but is not very keen or able to use either, unless food is involved.<br />
<b>Demeanor: </b>Quite shy and timid with people until he gets to know them, unless you have food, then you are automatically in his good books.<b> </b>Will sit on any part of any food giving human, covering them in fluff. Is mean and antagonistic to other cats when the food fork comes out, and is quite capable of eating his own bodyweight in anything, including other cats sick. Masterful scrounger, giving the thin eye* to people just to get extra food. He would be a confidence trickster if he had thumbs. At other times, he has been known to be very sweet and friendly to the other cats, including peeping* conversations with Mim.<br />
<b>Territory: </b>Laps, chairs, my chin, my pillow, anywhere the others have just vacated, the kitchen.<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/the%20cat/scared.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/the%20cat/scared.jpg" width="248" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Do I hear food?<br />
<br /></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
* See glossary.<br />
<br />
<br />
<b>Glossary.</b><b><br /></b><br />
<b>Boop: </b>when inverted by a human, the act of reaching one paw out and pressing it firmly on the humans nose, as if to say " NO! No further!" See also hush catting.<b><br /></b><br />
<b>Chickeny in the leg: </b>When upside down and stretched out, this is what happens to ones back legs, looking like chicken drumsticks, but hairy.<b><br /></b><br />
<b>Fat eyes: </b>See thin eyes.<br />
<b>Heebus/Heebing: </b>Standing one ones back legs, mainly to get a toy on a string, or a just out of reach treat. A full heeb involves waving of front legs, like one is praying.<br />
<strong>Hush Catting: </strong>Sort of like booping, but with the other front paw on the humans mouth.<br />
<b>Mimlish:</b> Being mimlish means a cat is behaving in a cute but agressive manner.<b><br /></b><br />
<b>Mimple:</b> The art of doing something despicable, whilst looking perfect and pure.<br />
<b>Mimping:</b> Prancing along on ones tippy toes, with ones tail held in a hooky manner.<br />
<b>Paff: </b>Smacking someone in the face without using claws, also known as jazz handing.<br />
<b>Peeping:</b> Getting your face close to another cats face, and exchanging greetings with little miow sounds<br />
<b>Pielets: </b>Small balls of chest fluff deposited on any surface that one feels like. They may or may not be proto cats.<br />
<b>Plimping/Plimper: </b>Plimping is a bit like mimping, but done in a more purposeful manner.<br />
<b>Squinching: </b>The art of having one eye slighly closed to give a lopsided expression.<br />
<b>Teapotting: </b>Neatly sitting upright with ones neck extended to full length, to see whats going on.<br />
<b>Trousers: </b>Proud and super fluffy haunches.<br />
<b>Thin eyes: </b>Making ones eyes look sorrowful, like a waif who has never been fed "Please sir, can I have some more?" When this act is done immediately post feeding, it is know as giving someone the fat eye.<br />
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<br />creadurhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13296763039067248323noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5329061031270157736.post-70030385265213175892012-04-07T18:11:00.001+00:002012-04-07T18:11:20.322+00:00Evil furry donuts and a migratory wall.It has been overly long since I last posted. I've been continually low, so have not felt up to doing anything much. Sorry about that.<br />
The first violets of spring were spotted when we went out litter picking last week, so that was a little cheer making at least.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/a9fb0f85-d052-413a-9ed3-845160775770.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="239" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/a9fb0f85-d052-413a-9ed3-845160775770.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Now I just wait for an insect to sit on my face.</td></tr>
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Also, the wall on the path into town has started its spring migration. Or that is at least what I presume is happening. It was fine during the winter, but now half of it is on the other side of the path from where it usually is. I'm sure, come the autumn, the wall will be back, maybe even with some wall-lets. I can watch them frolic on the golf course.<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/f7fe4022-0129-4fdc-930e-ecabc3e1a51f.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="61" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/f7fe4022-0129-4fdc-930e-ecabc3e1a51f.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">migratory path is from right to left.</td></tr>
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The cats have been odd....Well odd by our standards, but by cat standards they are probably quite sane. Ruth decided that the house needed consolidating, so now we have a library/office room < not popular with cats, but great for wi-fi>, and a living room where the sofa and the tv <em>are in the same room</em><popular with humans and our cat overlords>. The beanbag is also there. after some initial border disputes, involving Mim, sitting on the back of the sofa and jumping gleefully on anything/one who passed, things have settled a wee bit. Mystery has taken to lurking on my beanbag, as it is both near the radiator, and is dark brown, so he can hide in plain sight, like the ninja he is. He did try sitting on the back of the sofa, but kept either falling off, or having his butt sniffed by the Apricot nightmare, which hurt his kitty dignity. He sleeps in the middle of my bean bag, like the evil hairy filling in a doom donut. <br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/063279b7-d206-4374-84f4-6cbd173f64f9.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/063279b7-d206-4374-84f4-6cbd173f64f9.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Dignity? I am positively made of it, dear chap!</td></tr>
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On several occasions we have encountered the queen of pain, and the orange horror cohabiting on the sofa. I believe it to have been declared neutral ground, where they can meet and discuss the division of territory.<br />
<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/c45a9e18-8356-48be-a718-a593b55817a7.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/c45a9e18-8356-48be-a718-a593b55817a7.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Negotiations in progress. </td></tr>
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Mim: I require, nay DEMAND, the dining room table top.<br />
Pie: But it is very uncomfortable. * gently farts*<br />
Mim: None the less, disgusting one, I wish it. It takes my fancy to watch the birds through the window. The unsuspecting foooooools! * rubs her precious paws together, evilly*<br />
Pie: Fine, but I get to sleep on the male humans pillow. * burps smellily*<br />
Mim: Agreed, as long as you do not stray onto the female humans fuzzy fleece, or so help me I will cut you, cut you HARD.<br />
Pie: As you wish Mi'Lady.<br />
Mystery: Quiet morsels! I must sleep, for tonight I plan to poop most mightily.<br />
<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/7ae81868-7031-4b4a-be1c-13717cf0421f.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v210/waylander/7ae81868-7031-4b4a-be1c-13717cf0421f.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Touch my belly, I dare you.</td></tr>
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Tomorrow I shall post something about the various names of the cats, and household names for things they do.<br />
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<br />creadurhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13296763039067248323noreply@blogger.com0